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Author Topic: Yet another poetry blog.  (Read 1178 times)

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Offline ShirokuTheHusky

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Yet another poetry blog.
« on: September 27, 2015, 08:13:49 PM »
Most of my poetry is complete and utter crap, but sometimes I'll write something worth reading. To start, I'll post a tidbit I wrote in another thread.
I would love to hear some feedback!
« Last Edit: October 16, 2015, 03:57:05 AM by ShirokuTheHusky »
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Offline ShirokuTheHusky

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Re: Yet another poetry blog.
« Reply #1 on: September 27, 2015, 08:20:25 PM »
When you work, you tire. Tire from your day. You hide it. You hide it because you need to work more. A job like yours holds up your world. But you mustn't sleep. No, never. Not even a nap. For when you nap the sky will fall. And when the sky falls you hear the coins. The coins are not profit. You hear your coins. Falling. Buying. Being spent. When you sleep you loose your possessions. Your children. Yourself.
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Offline ShirokuTheHusky

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Re: Yet another poetry blog.
« Reply #2 on: September 27, 2015, 08:54:35 PM »
It sits in the corner,
It asks you for you name.
You find her to be odd,
Maybe even insane.
She asks you a question,
In silence, you remain.
But why do you do this?
She asks you her name.
You realise your acknowledgment,
She is not just an it.
You run to the corner.
Right there you will sit.
Am I going crazy?
Well maybe, just a bit.
And someone walks up to you.
You ask for their name as you sit.
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Offline ShirokuTheHusky

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Re: Yet another poetry blog.
« Reply #3 on: October 16, 2015, 03:57:34 AM »
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Offline John "Alpha" Fox

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Re: Yet another poetry blog.
« Reply #4 on: October 16, 2015, 05:35:03 AM »
i'll be 100% honest! i liked them, the first 2 ran so deep... the 3rd one though... it was very confusing, but somehow made sense to me... your good...  i like your style... i dont like poems, but yours are good in my eyes
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