Wrote an essay about being a furry for college

[Rocoro T. Pup]

Hey all! Back last year, I wrote an essay for my college English class. The topic was occasions or hobbies that have dramatically changed your life. I have shared this with many relatives and others, but I decided to post it here to see what you all thought of it.

Just a heads up: this essay is LONG. Definetley not a quick read.

Thanks, anyfur. Enjoy.


 

The Candid Canine Inside:
 A Written Analogy of Life and Hobby

When I was growing up, I didn't have too many friends. I was pretty anti-socialized, and in rural New York, the few friends that I had lived tens of miles away. I was very lonely and expressionless, and did not relate well with people. But that’s not the person I am today, at least not until I met Rocoro. Rocoro isn’t a good friend, a loyal pet, or a close relative. In the real world, Rocoro doesn’t even physically exist, yet. The truth is Rocoro is me. Some psychologists or doctors may theorize that I’m creating an imaginary friend and will assume I’m crazy. Many of my family and friends already start to look at me strangely because of my belief in the community that Rocoro thrives in. In fact, he is my alternate persona, or fursona as it’s referred to in one of the oldest and largest online and social communities of the 21st century. This community simply called the “furry community”, strung together by literally tens of millions of people around the world, is branched out into a labyrinth of related online forums, artwork, literary pieces, comic books, conventions, and has now become a part of my life. The general idea of being a furry is explained well by the website anthrocon.com. Furries are generally “a collection of artists, animators, writers, costumers, puppeteers, and just everyday fans who enjoy cartoon animals and their kin.” Even if the “person” doing the socializing is Rocoro, being a furry has made me become a more sociable and accepting person. However, people in the furry community are often targeted as being persona non grata; an untouchable, beyond redemptive mockery of the Internet. I am also considered a rookie to the furry lifestyle, and may not be accepted by many of the others, so there are still many questions that I feel are unanswered. Can I fit in with the community that I so love to be a part of, or am I destined to be cast out by the community and go back to the reclusive, lonely life I started with?
  In 9th grade, I had moved from Poughkeepsie to San Francisco and back again. I became socially severed and emotionally deranged. Puzzled by the scale and society of Queens, I was often the target of bullying and rejection from people I have never met before, and rumors began to spread about me every time I opened my mouth in public. I made a few friends that I still hold onto today, and I love them very much. Yet the bullying persisted and I became more and more unstable mentally. As a filmmaker to be, I had a very artistic and expressionist side that I frequently hid inside myself and seldom showed. I'm very shy when it comes to making an appearance, but I feel like a god behind a camera; using my mind to paint visionary images and stories. I suppose that I was born with the “entertainer” gene inside of me, but why was I so afraid to show it? I also stayed true to my heritage, being a fan of the New York Mets. One day in tenth grade, while playing video games online, a friend referred me to a drawing that he had made using Photoshop. I opened the link, and there was a sketch that he drew of an anthropomorphic fox and his girlfriend, an anthropomorphic cat, sitting on a beach drinking piña coladias. This was not the only related drawing that my friend had. He has an entire album of these drawings that he created. How could I resist asking him what style of art he was showing me? Once he replied “Anthro art, you know, like furries,” my curiosity caught up with me and I began researching. What the hell was this thing? The furry community still stands as a group of individuals who are accustomed to portraying animal traits and are engaged in the styles of such. There are thousands of popular comics, literary pieces, movies, and conventions where people celebrate and express their love in the anthro fashion, and these pieces of work and art such as the one my friend showed me sparked my interest. Fast forward to today, and I feel more at peace with myself knowing that the furry community that I’m now a part of keeps me well entertained. With many pieces of art, and plenty of chat rooms and forums, I feel delightful to start conversations with other “furs” and see what they’re interested in, ask what their fursona is, and other questions relating to popular-culture, tech talk, and basic news headlines. People in these conversations and communities go by their fursona: an anthromorphic animal representation of themselves. So I created Rocoro the dhole out of what I loved in life. He is a blue, grey, and orange dhole, since I am a fan of the Mets, and very artistic and outgoing. I chose not to make Rocoro shy or blissful, but I didn’t want to make his personality too far apart from my own. The furry community consists of many friendly “furs” who love to engage in conversations about their personalities and whatever they’re into, and offers pieces of more amazing that anything I’ve ever seen in a museum. This community is more unique than anything I’ve ever been a part of, yet today it feels so familiar to me. There is a lot to share, experience, and feel in this online and social community, and I enjoy it all.
  Conversely, society views this lifestyle as strange, even dangerous, to the mind. Being a furry can bring negative feedback from others. Many on the religious right see this attachment to animal personas as bestiality, and that we are often engaged in pseudo-sexual behavior known as “yiffing”. A common oxymoron is that people who are furries are emotionally deranged, hopelessly lonesome, or clinically depressed. Online, the furry culture has a damning definition, such as being the worst possible group of human beings online and often being the target of extraordinary teasing. Furries often regarded as the “punching-bags” of the new-age digital society, and refereed to with very vulgar slurs. How could one resist not insulting a person in a fursuit who believes that he has animal-like traits? I believe it is an unfair scapegoat. Just like people who are part of the otaku community (anime) and often unfairly described as a whole as being emo or solitary, furries are regarded as being desolate and moody quite the same. Unfortunately, many people in furry communities are actually more anti-social and depressed than most, and often prove this stereotype to be very, very true. Most of the community is full of energetic, thoughtful and considerate people, but once in a while you’ll come across a bad apple who either wants to start an argument or really is a troubled fur. I was talking to a person on a forum one day. This individual had started a post explaining how mentally unstable he was and that he had tried to kill himself recently. He also mentioned that he suffered from bi-polar disorder, and since he could explode of rage at any moment, has joined and often retreats to the furry society as a as a form of escapism. The most shocking part of the post was one of the last sentences that he wrote, claiming that he was more familiarized with his fursona and the community than in real life, and found it difficult to detach from. Many furs responded to his post. Some comments were from furs that sympathized with him, but others were very pushy and told him that he was at fault for his outbursts and criticized him as a very twisted person. Rocoro chose not to comment and went to find another post to read, but it left me thinking for a long time. After I discovered that this person was not a rare bird, but was in fact one of many, I was convinced that becoming too absorbed in the culture I had only simply begun being a part of may be dangerous to my mental health as well. This person represented the image that furries are described as by the world. I vow to keep my time between the forums and the online community away from my personal life, but will my anti-social behavior blur the line between the two? When furries are teased for their lifestyle, many furs just brush it off. What about me? Can I handle being part of a community that is viewed as destructive, ignorant, and cynical?
  Many of my peers will believe that my commitment to the furry community may leave me socially impaired or disconnected with reality, but I refute those claims as the community that I am a part of is merely a hobby to me. Nevertheless, the questions that I often ask myself that has yet to be answered are “How greatly will this fursona consume my life?” and “How are you going to keep Rocoro separate from your personal self?” However, one of the single most principal questions that I face is “What next?” There is still much to experience in the community than from what I’ve seen. I have only scraped the surface of what there is to experience. There are conventions that I’d love to go to, furs in real life that I want to meet, and perhaps illustrations and movies related to the furries that I would love to produce. I’ve already shown myself that I have the perseverance to try something totally new and enjoy it, so perhaps I can take Rocoro and my love for being a furry to being to being more than just a hobby. But will I lose my personal life entirely? I want to be a more social person, but I would always prefer the real life than an imitation. Will I become so obsessed with being a furry that I’ll look disconnected from the world by my peers? I believe only time will tell. I am very excited for what this secret lifestyle has shown and brought me, but I am afraid that if I become too absorbed in its color, artistry, and dazzle, that I will be right back to where I started as a leper. Time proved that I have the perseverance to endure and accept this lifestyle, so perhaps only time can answer the question: “What’s next?”

[ImaLionRoarr]

Simply amazing, no other words for it, you can really read that you have put your feelings and soul into it not to forget bravery to actually tell it to someone who may or may not respond too well (the teacher in this case)


What did you get for it? At least an A- I may hope?
Ever considered writing articles by the way? Because you should.

[MrRazot]

Very good article on the fandom.
I once described it in this way:

The fandom is nothing but a shell for social interaction where participants are drawn from the mutual interest in anthropomorphic animals.

[NovaAurora]

This is definitely one of the best pieces of furry literature I've read. Very well written, insightful on a personal level and an objective level that addresses the fandom as a whole. I'd be interested to hear how people who don't know much about the fandom would respond.

[DarkWolf556]

How did your teacher react to this?

[Luccas Hunter]

Great essay. Good luck becoming an accomplished producer and remember to have fun!

[Rocoro T. Pup]

How did your teacher react to this?

Sorry for the super-late reply. He loved the essay, but gave me a B+ for spelling and grammar errors. Still few in number, and the grade lifted my GPA over the passing level. Thank you so much for reading!