Poems, One liners, puns And Short Storys

[Shoon]

I thought for a while about making this. I will post here everything I can come up with.
As for an example there are many times I say very very very silly things, such as the next which will be the first thing here.


"(Insert name of my brother here), Your egg which enfaletes in water has just carcked open and told me to rush B".

[ChurchFuzz]

My favourite pun:
I had to get rid of my vacuum cleaner: it was just gathering dust!

[Shoon]

That was is brilliant!
Here are 2 from today: "Don't turn your face inside out, its bad for you existence", "The thrill not dancing when somebody looks at you".

[ChurchFuzz]

I'm starting to enjoy this - yours were great!
How about this:
A man asked me what the word on the street was.  "STOP." I said.

[Shoon]

I dont think I get it.

[ChurchFuzz]

...bad joke about road markings.
This is worse (not strictly a pun)
How of you know if an elephant has been hiding in the fridge?






Footprints in the butter.

[Shoon]

Israel is in chaos because of fire all across the land in big cities.
I wrote a poem about my country's state.

Fire is just a distraction
It burns big and it burns great but even after its gone a danger still remains
You can use it to try and forget, maybe you even forgot
But a fire is just a distraction
and a danger still remains
you may say its more important
you may run to try and help
but where was that help before and where will it be after the fire is over
fire is just a distraction and it will leave and return
but the danger remains and was always here

[White Mage]

Sorry for interrupting your thread Soon but I just noticed this:

My favourite pun:
I had to get rid of my vacuum cleaner: it was just gathering dust!

When you clean a vacuum cleaner, you become a vacuum cleaner. 

[Shoon]

how did I now notice that!?!

[White Mage]

Oh Oh!

What's your best (worst) pick up line?

I have one, but you can share yours first if you want.

[Shoon]

I dont have any.

[White Mage]

Aww,

But anyways, I just wanted to say, -prolonged probing stare-

"Every minute I have spent with you has felt... just like sixty seconds!"

 Are you not touched?

[Shoon]

Its, neat... Not sure if its a good pick-up line though.

[White Mage]

Meh, I was going for the, "Its so bad its good", kind of joke.

[Ori]

(Most of these I've heard before).

Girl, you're like a donut, all curves and sugar. (That was from Rando comics.)

Hey Gal, my phone is broke
Girl:How come ?
It doesn't have ya number in it.
Girl: You've got to be kitten me.

How hard was the fall?
Girl: What fall?
Your fall from heaven...

How did you hide your wings?
Girl: Wings?
Your angel wings?

(Artist pick up lines.)
Girl, If I ever, ever tried to draw you... I'd disgrace your beauty
or
Girl, would you like to be the first and most beautiful thing I've drawn in my life.
or
(If you're drawing the girl.) I can't quite make you as beautiful at you look. (Makes a perfect replica).
AHA I got it, I was missing the halo.


...
WHY DO I HAVE ALL THESE RANDOM PICKUP LINES? I swear leave it to me to think of some stupid crud while in school.