Author Topic: What do I do?  (Read 909 times)

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Offline Sylvilix

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What do I do?
« on: January 25, 2014, 04:22:25 AM »
So I'm sixteen. I recently got a prosthetic because I lost my leg to cancer. I don't like being in public. I used to be very out going and would normally be the "nice guy" but ever since I lost my leg i haven't really wanted attention. I like hiding behind my wall of the internet. My dad thinks its unhealthy. He is forcing me to go get a job or I lose my computer, phone, ipad, Xbox, and tv. So of course I went looking for a job. All the places near me say I need to be 18+ or they aren't hiring. My dad doesn't believe me! So not only am I being forced to feel uncomfortable in public but I'm being punished for something that's out of my control. If you are under the age of 15 I would advise you stop reading now. I got really upset one night because my dad said I'm ruining his marriage and he can't wait for me to be 18 so he can kick me out. I actually cut myself for the first time in three years. I was about to just end it but I was afraid. So I talked to my aunt who lives two states away. I feel like she would buy me a plane ticket and let me stay with her but I don't know how to ask her because they have 4 kids and barely enough room for that! I really want to leave now but I don't know what to do. Any advice?
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Offline Delete me

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #1 on: January 25, 2014, 04:33:14 AM »
It sounds to me like your having a really hard time.  Try talking to your dad and seeing if he could help you find a job.  You know your dad better than I do so if you know he wouldn't help or he her would just be an ass then don't bother. 


In general with these kinds of life changing decisions such as moving, you really should think about it and heavily discuss it with both your dad and your aunt before making any decisions.


Hope things get better  :(

Offline Sylvilix

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #2 on: January 25, 2014, 04:34:24 AM »
I can't talk to him about it. Then he would freak out even worse. I appreciate the feedback.
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Offline anoni

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #3 on: January 25, 2014, 08:03:24 AM »
  The first thing I'd have to say is if you are having these thoughts, to contact a psychiatrist or therapist, they will be able to help you deal with the anxiety you feel from having a prosthetic leg. A prosthetic leg shouldn't bother you though, it's nothing to be ashamed of, depending on how large the prosthetic is (if it's below the knee then it's almost barely noticeable in some cases, wear long pants and you'll be fine). But of course, I can't imagine the feelings that you're going through now happening to have gone through all of that, but I will tell you there is nothing wrong with a prosthetic, it tells that you are a survivor, that you've been through something not many people have and for that it can make you a better person. There are people everywhere, including me, who worry about needless details, but we are unable to get the a truly wise experience from something like that, your prosthetic says you're strong, you're powerful, you're wise. I don't see why it would be shameful, but again I can't imagine what you are thinking.

  For your job, if your dad doesn't believe you ask him for help finding a job. If he accepts there are two possible ways that can turn out.
     1. You can't find a job and then he realizes how hard it is
     2. You can find a job and hey! You've got a job!

  It's important to communicate with your family members how there actions affect you, tell your father that the reason you haven't been public about is anxiety from your prosthetic. Do it in a nice calm manner though, definitely not in an argument, just sit down with him and calmly and politely tell him the reason he hasn't been out, and maybe that you want to see a therapist (if you do, I think it'll be a good idea maybe). Unless you already have a terrible relationship with your father, he should understand in some way.

  Also a job is important, if you get a job when you're young it makes it much easier to get job when you're older. I know it sucks cause you want to do the stuff you want to do, but another big plus with jobs is you get money, you get quite a bit of money relative to an allowance. I'm not sure where you live so the wages are dependent but if you make say $10 an hour, and you work 5 hours a day for three days, you make $150 a week, which (for me anyway) is a good sum of money!
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Offline Delete me

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #4 on: January 25, 2014, 03:12:09 PM »
Antoni makes a very good point about the prosthetic leg.  It, although maybe awkward,should be something that shows how strong you are.  You survived cancer and I simply can't imagine how hard the must be.




Offline HyenaKing

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2014, 05:51:02 PM »
If you can, Participate in DECA.
Its like a buissiness class,
http://www.deca.org/
If you take it and slap it on your reseme most of the time they will ingore your a minor.
Becaus its a good thing.

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Offline Sylvilix

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #6 on: January 25, 2014, 05:53:54 PM »
No they won't even give me the chance to show my resume. Also, I can't reason with my dad. When I'm around he just gets this annoyed facial expression and when I talk to him it always turns into him yelling at me and me sitting there ignoring him because if I respond it just makes it worse.
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Offline HyenaKing

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #7 on: January 25, 2014, 05:56:14 PM »
Ow, that sucks!
How about applying for a job online?
They take a peek at the reseme before they take a look at ya~!
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Offline Sylvilix

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #8 on: January 25, 2014, 05:58:37 PM »
Yeah I apply online but there's nowhere to upload my resume. It says I would have to bring it to the interview if they asked me to go to an interview.
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Offline HyenaKing

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #9 on: January 25, 2014, 06:03:42 PM »
Your in a tough pickle!
Do you have a way to hide your electronic belingings?
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Offline anoni

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2014, 06:23:11 PM »
I still think getting your dad to help you is a good idea, even if you can't sit down and talk with him, he should be willing to help you find a job. It'll be annoying for sure, you might get into some scuffles (try not to say "no" too much, even if what he asks you to do is useless or stupid, to avoid scuffles) but it will either show him how hard it is to find a job, so he doesn't blame you anymore, or you'll actually get a job.
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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #11 on: January 25, 2014, 07:46:58 PM »
Maybe you can talk to somebody at your school about looking over and refining your resume. I'm sure there are faculty members who could give you help or advice in getting a job.

Offline Sylvilix

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #12 on: January 25, 2014, 07:49:02 PM »
I don't go to school. I do it online. Talking to my dad for help is out of the question. Just trust me on this. I can't ask him for help.
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Offline William Dynwood

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #13 on: January 25, 2014, 07:52:29 PM »
Don't you have anyone, that you really trust? There has to be someone like that!

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Offline Nobi

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Re: What do I do?
« Reply #14 on: January 25, 2014, 07:55:56 PM »
Well, in that case, try searching online for centers that help with career-related stuff. I know there are some counselling centers/services out there that will help you to really beef up your resume and point you to some jobs that are likely to hire you.

 

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