I'm in trouble now.

[Armalite_]

Today seemed like a perfectly good day...until my mom decided to clean my room for me. That's when she found me stash of cigarettes and alcohol. I came home and this happened.

"Mark?" - mom
"Yes?" - me
"Do you smoke?" - mom
"No" - me
"Then what is all this?" *she holds up my all of my cigarette cases* -mom
"...Ok, I smoke." - me

my mom scolded me, I was yelled at. She called my dad, he scolded me, my brothers found out, they laughed at me. I was lectured several times.

"Why?" - mom
"Because I hate my life and I'm really ******* stressed!" - me
"Then play  your guitar or something! We don't want you smoking!" - mom
"I honestly could not care less, mom" - me
"Well you should care! We're your parents!" - mom
"You're right, I should but I don't and probably never will." - me

They took all of my cigarettes, liquor bottles and my pride. I was grounded.
After that I really considered killing myself or leaving the house and taking the car altogether but that would make them cry so instead I sat in my room and forum posted all day in here.

And that's my story. I sure as **** don't feel better about it.

[Vosur Aekira]

Too many things I see wrong with this... One, you're way too young to even consider smoking or drinking by legal means. Two, if you live in their household, you abide by their rules. Three, stealing the car will not work if you intend to get away from them as you may attempt to try drinking or smoking again... and the state of mind you're in at this moment will only lead you into a life of hardship (or no life at all). Four, considering suicide is not the way to go as you have a long life ahead of you, there are opportunities for you to achieve out there. And lastly, you can live without drinking alcohol or smoking tobacco.

I've lived 24 years (approaching 25) of not touching tobacco or pressing an alcoholic beverage to my lips. If you need help in getting rid of those addictions, there are people who can help and options out there to help you.

[Armalite_]

I'm in Canada. This means I can legally smoke and drink in designated areas, however, I am not allowed to legally purchase from a licensed dealer. Second, I've stated that I don't care what my parents say. When i said I was going to steal the car, I meant i wasn't going back home...ever, but I would return the car, eventually. Yes, this means I'd probably stay with a friend and continue my bad habits but I'm not stupid. I'd still go to school and all, but I'd be moving out. The reason I started smoking is because I needed a change. I was getting so unbelievably bored with my life, I didn't see any point in living. I replaced one problem with another. I don't want to kill myself, but omg does life ever suck so I pursue cheap thrills.  I'm not addicted either (I know how this sounds). I need help? maybe... or maybe I just something that will convince me that there is something more to look forward to other than the end of the day. The same old routine for the past 16 years of my life. Relationship after relationship, summer after summer, year after year. I have my future lined up, it's looking pretty good, so are my grades, thing is...I don't find anything appealing anymore.

[PhantomStone]

just because your life is boring doesn't mean you should do bad things just for a change of pace. you might not know it now, but smoking and drinking is terrible for you, physically, socially and mentally. my friend (he was my boyfriend before this, one of my really good friends) went to Germany, where the drinking age is around 14, he was there for over a month, he was so different when he came back. we haven't been friends sense. the alcohol changed him, beer cans followed him when he got out of the car, he got new stoner friends (i hope mentioning stoner's isn't bad for the forums) and probably did drugs for a while too. he just changed, he wasn't fun to hang out with anymore. he seemed so much different.

i know that your thinking that 'that's one kid' hundreds of kids deal with this every day, they change, and if you ask them when they grow up (if they even get that far) they will say how much they regret doing that, doing drugs and alcohol and the like.

for something appealing try starting a new sport, a new club, a new group of friends? anything that is constructive. and talk to your parents, they may seem terrible now, but they gave birth to you, they have raised you for 16 years. driving you to where you needed to go, giving you a place to stay. being the people who congratulated you on a good grade or a new (not crazy) girl friend. also they probably were the people that were there for you when everything else around you was changing. they have always been your parents and they always will.

for not finding anything worth living for, well we can just talk at you all day till we all get carpal tunnel, but if you want to change your life the best idea is to talk to a shrink or your parents. it's your life, but anyone you talk to that knows at least a bit about you, will tell you not to waste all the work you put into your life by suicide, or by ruining your life with drugs and alcohol. especially your parents, they will probably stand by you through doctor's visits, or shrink visits. they are your parents and they always be. (now for my favorite quote in my life) friends come and go, but family is forever.

[KittKat chunky~]

hey... im 16... tried a ***... drink alcohol, not on too regular a basis and can see where your heading from....... i pine for you and seriously.... DONT COMMIT SUICIDE!..... i had a friend... last year... hung himself in the front room......WTF? me and my friends saw it as a waste of life and really miss him... im sure many would miss you..... i too have often gotten bored of life... however........ i find drawing and sketching and goin to my youth group a good outlet... although i myself have a slight adiction (pyromaniac, proven..) i cannot give you good advice and can only hope the best for you... spike.....

[Count of Cutesy]

I kinda know what you mean by life sucks. Sometimes, I feal like everything in life is meant to drive me insane. In gameshows, almost every time, the one person I don't want to win usually does. At home, I feal like everything I do is wrong. I can't do anything without being yelled at. At school, I used to get picked on all the time, and because of it, I had dark thoughts. ... But now that I have graduated, that's all done with.

But anyway, ciggarettes and alchahol aren't the answer. Simply put.

[Armalite_]

They're not. You're right. However, smoking and drinking aren't the worst things I've ever done (I don't think I can talk about them in here but you know what I'm getting at). Hardcore drugs aren't my thing but I've been down that road for a very short while. I guess I could find some new friends, give it a shot I guess and talk to some people. I won't see a shrink (they upset me more than anything *facepalm*). In other words, I have essentially tried just about everything and really the only thing that give me my outlet are the things I know that will probably/most likely end up with me...not in the best of positions. I'm laying off the smoking for a while. I may have a drink every once in a while but not as much or as often. I don't know, but I'll see where things take me.

[KittKat chunky~]

hmmm... good to see your atitude has changed... at least for now..... look at life and see whether there really would be a point in ending it........ im sure there wouldnt.......

[Wolfgang]

there are many ways to help with stress without tabacco or alcohol. For me I mediate in my room, I light some bundled up sage and I listen to some Zen.

[Armalite_]

I'm not really stressed. I only said that as a legit reply to my mom when she asked why. Really, what I am is just bored...to the MAX...with everything. It's been almost a week since my last smoke session and I must say...It's not that easy (yes, ok, I'm addicted). Meditation doesn't work for me either even though I've tried it...not my thing. Good suggestion otherwise.

[Wolfgang]

smoking is addicting I'll admit that, I have many friends that smoke, and one time I tried weed and I got high. I didn't like the feeling.

[Armalite_]

Yeah, I know some people that don't like smoking weed. I haven't smoked weed in forever but when I did, I loved it. Sometimes it was good, other times it really sucked. This one time I thought I was dying and I had have my friend keep reminding me where I was and what I was doing. When we were driving, I thought the stop signs were people who instantly turned back into signs when I got close enough to check it out. THOSE were the good times. The first time I tried it, I was high and sitting in math class. It was the very first time I paid attention the whole class and actually understood EVERYTHING but the next day I completely forgot it all. It varies from person to person I guess.

[WingedZephyr]

Keep in mind that there are minors around here, and that we don't advocate use of any drugs.

[Armalite_]

Yes, I know. I was just sharing my input. I didn't mean to advocate the use of drugs. Sorry if there was any misunderstanding.

[Goblin Cat 😸]

Look, basically, you're going to hate me for my input.

As far as I look at it, you can't turn to drugs / alcohol / cigarettes for happiness because you're "BORED TO THE MAX" of your life. There are plenty of people who are bored of their life.. And if you don't like where you're at, get off you butt and change that. In the end, those things only give you temporary happiness, and once you come out of the haze.. Guess what? Back to your life. You just exchanged a bit of your health and cash to be numb and completely out of it for a little while. Was it really worth that? And will it be worth it a few years down the road when you develop an addiction because you find yourself depressed? Will it be worth it when you're willing to lie, cheat, and steal to get it? Will it be worth it when those things outweigh the important things in life? No.

I know right now you're in the phase where it's, "I'm not really addicted," and "that can't happen to me," but believe me.. It can and will. You need to just let go and grow up. Open your eyes and look at how it will affect others and stop being selfish. You've tried? Obviously not hard enough. You're going to have to go out of your comfort zone if you want to change.