Losing a Mate

[WhiteTiger89]

I've been going back and forth about whether or not I wanted to post this here, but I've finally decided to do so because I feel like I'm going to need all the support I can get going forward.

My mate recently broke up with me. I don't really blame her for it. I'm an author and for the last year or so, I'd pretty much closed myself in a bubble trying to launch my first novel. Yet even though I understand her reasons for breaking up with me, it doesn't make it hurt any less. I was actually planning on asking her to marry me once I got my life back on track. She knows more about me than anyone, I trust her more than anyone else, and apart from the simple pain of loss, I'm terrified of having to try and start from square one with someone else at some point.

She's told me several times that she's more than willing to give me a second chance once I get things stabilized and leave my bubble for good, but I have a nasty pessimistic side that's trying to tell me that nothing will ever change.

I could really use some help and encouragement here. I've never hit a low like this before.  :'(

[Puncia]

You will find enough encouragement in your own heart if you truly love her. She loves you after all. 

[WhiteTiger89]

Thank you Puncia.

[Puncia]

Ha, it's not much of an encouragement from me but I think it's the most valuable. You can do anything if your heart desires it.

[MinxKitty]

If you really love her, then you need to work on juggling your career and her.. she needs to feel important in your life not just be told it.. If she's willing to give you a second chance, then she probrably loves you alot ...
Starting again is always hard, and it more time consuming and crazy, especially with your career to consider..
In my opinnion, you need to get your life sorted and get her back, set time aside for her and take her out!
Good luck with it and your book
MK
xox

[The_GMan]

By braking up with you she only wanted to wake you up so you could realize how much she cares and likes you, to be honest it was a nice move of her to help you get out of your bubble. I know you need to focus a lot if you want to launch a novel, but you don't need to focus alone

If she wants to give you a second chance, you should grab it and forget about your novel for now, get your bonds with her more solid, discuss your novel with her, show her your new ideas and share your thoughts with her. But remember that your love comes first.

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

These are some great points. and another idea is why dont you try and involve her in your writing side? That way she can feel close to you and even help you, making her feel more valued. If you said you were planning on marrying her, then surely you'd want her to have an involvement in all aspects of your life?

[WhiteTiger89]

Thank you all for your wonderful replies. The last few days haven't been easy for me, but reading all your thoughts and advice has helped me regain some of the hope I'd lost. Living without hope is a very unpleasant thing.

@ Riku: Her help with my writing is actually one of the reasons I wanted to marry her. Any time my plans would get too grandiose, she would be there to pull me back down a little closer to reality. And any time I got really discouraged, she would never let me lose hope or give up.

[MinxKitty]

Any time my plans would get too grandiose, she would be there to pull me back down a little closer to reality. And any time I got really discouraged, she would never let me lose hope or give up

GET HER BACK!!
xox

[WhiteTiger89]

MinxKitty, I don't think you'll ever know how much I needed that laugh/smile.

You know, I've never really believed in coincidence. Especially since I met her. And just a couple months ago, I saw a poster for a book that was coming out soon called Tiger's Curse, and this poster was the face of a white tiger with blue eyes on a blue background. It was like staring at a mirror, only the reflection was one of my fursona. I knew then that I had to buy and read this book because like I said, I don't believe in coincidence. I finally finished the book earlier today, a few weeks after I finally got a copy (It's signed by the author too. ), and *SPOILER ALERT!!!* The girl breaks up with the guy in the end for reasons that felt hauntingly applicable to my situation. ie: Guy's so young, can't know for sure what he wants cause he hasn't seen the world, could have any girl he wanted at the drop of a hat... (Not so sure that last one applies to me. )

Just thought I'd share that because I thought it was interesting and because I've found books before that have been eerily similar to questions I've prayed for answers too. Like I'll pray for the answer to something, and then WITHIN DAYS I'll cross paths with a book that sounds/looks frighteningly like an answer.

[MinxKitty]

Damn, God must love you.. I wish I had that luck.. I've prayed for help so many times when lifes been getting impossible.. Nothing ever happens though ...
xox