I need help with something i cant do any thing about

[armagre]

I need help with something i cant do anything about, its about my mum.
she has mistreated me and my father for so long its getting harder to keep my emotions to my self without completely getting rid of them... if that makes sense. I'm trying to keep what little emotion i have, that woman wrecked what emotion i use to have as a kid.
hmmm i think i should start with a little history, im not use to openly talking about such personal things about me

For most of my kid life my father hid what my mother really was, this ugly beast. She pretended to be my mum in presence of others and when no one was around, i was nothing. There was fights everyday over things i didnt understand. When i would ask questions about even the smallest things she would ignore them if i was lucky or yell at me for what ever reason it was at the moment. Dad divorced her and she was gone... but we took pity on her and i truly believed that she learned her lesson and would not treat us badly as she had before, it was just one of her tricks.

I get out of grade school and im now in hell called middle school. Mum didnt help me in anyway during this point, the only thing she did was take the teachers side and get me in more trouble over things. Then when i got home she made my life heck... i forget which of the two years i was there in middle school but, i was so stressed that one day i literally woke up with only  a feeling of half of my emotions. I thought this would pass so i didnt think nothing of it. Really it was just the first part in the future emotional numbing i would get.
I took a week of therapy, dad thought it would help mum to hear a 3rd person tell her that we are right, that she should change, it never worked.

Highschool life is a bit easier in this school, so thats a little less stress. Each year there though mum got worse and worse with threats of harming me and my father breaking my things and so on. She is found clinically insane... doctors wont take her, cops, her own family... no one wants her shes so evil. Me and father dont know what to do with her shes getting to violent, and no one does anything. I hate my mum for not working for 6 years telling my 50 year old father to get a 2nd job when there is non out there. I hate her for putting us in a position were we have to either move out or take a chance and keep the house (problem is, she will be there) She never wanted the house but got forbid we have anything. I hate her for eating all of our food and i have barley anything to eat by the time shes done. I hate her for being the worlds biggest hypocrite for not wanting the house for my whole life and now only wants it just to put us in a loose loose position. She is the worlds smartest bomb, she knows exactly how to ruin everything even herself.

Now im here typing, its 3:30pm and im awake unable to sleep im so frustrated, confused and depressed. Its hard to control what i cannot feel (I have emotions i just cant feel them very easy, its very hard to explain)
This is my fathers mate... why is she doing this? why would anyone do this? and for what, to prove to herself that she was right.

hmmm... i might type out more later. So far its helped me calm down.... i just i really knew what to do about her

[^Geist^]

I need help with something i cant do anything about, its about my mum.
she has mistreated me and my father for so long its getting harder to keep my emotions to my self without completely getting rid of them... if that makes sense. I'm trying to keep what little emotion i have, that woman wrecked what emotion i use to have as a kid.
hmmm i think i should start with a little history, im not use to openly talking about such personal things about me

For most of my kid life my father hid what my mother really was, this ugly beast. She pretended to be my mum in presence of others and when no one was around, i was nothing. There was fights everyday over things i didnt understand. When i would ask questions about even the smallest things she would ignore them if i was lucky or yell at me for what ever reason it was at the moment. Dad divorced her and she was gone... but we took pity on her and i truly believed that she learned her lesson and would not treat us badly as she had before, it was just one of her tricks.

I get out of grade school and im now in hell called middle school. Mum didnt help me in anyway during this point, the only thing she did was take the teachers side and get me in more trouble over things. Then when i got home she made my life heck... i forget which of the two years i was there in middle school but, i was so stressed that one day i literally woke up with only  a feeling of half of my emotions. I thought this would pass so i didnt think nothing of it. Really it was just the first part in the future emotional numbing i would get.
I took a week of therapy, dad thought it would help mum to hear a 3rd person tell her that we are right, that she should change, it never worked.

Highschool life is a bit easier in this school, so thats a little less stress. Each year there though mum got worse and worse with threats of harming me and my father breaking my things and so on. She is found clinically insane... doctors wont take her, cops, her own family... no one wants her shes so evil. Me and father dont know what to do with her shes getting to violent, and no one does anything. I hate my mum for not working for 6 years telling my 50 year old father to get a 2nd job when there is non out there. I hate her for putting us in a position were we have to either move out or take a chance and keep the house (problem is, she will be there) She never wanted the house but got forbid we have anything. I hate her for eating all of our food and i have barley anything to eat by the time shes done. I hate her for being the worlds biggest hypocrite for not wanting the house for my whole life and now only wants it just to put us in a loose loose position. She is the worlds smartest bomb, she knows exactly how to ruin everything even herself.

Now im here typing, its 3:30pm and im awake unable to sleep im so frustrated, confused and depressed. Its hard to control what i cannot feel (I have emotions i just cant feel them very easy, its very hard to explain)
This is my fathers mate... why is she doing this? why would anyone do this? and for what, to prove to herself that she was right.

hmmm... i might type out more later. So far its helped me calm down.... i just i really knew what to do about her

Yeesh. I've had family problems pretty bad before but have never heard of an incident like this. My only thoughts suggestion is get someone thats close to her to talk to her why. It could possibly be an external source but regardless she has no right what she has done to you and your father. Mind me if my suggestion wasnt that much of help towards you but i tried my best. IF you ever need someone to just talk to I'd be happy to listen. I personally feel though that regardless of the situation you should think about the positives ( the fact that your still with the dad,highschool is less stressful<HOW IS THIS STATEMENT POSSIBLE >etc etc) as hard as it may be.

[Kaprika]

this sadly sounds so similar to my own family life..some differences here and there but the gist is still there.

there is no changing a person like that...someone that has lived that long like that, they are set in there ways. honestly speaking she probably doesnt even think she is doing anything wrong, someone like that justifies there every action with there own twisted logic and there is no altering there self set reality. to her YOU are the problem and she is the one having to deal with your..difficulties.
my father made the same mistake yours did..the only difference is that HIS mistake lost him me and my sister and he never got to hear from us again...she stole us away and he forever had to live with that.
(my mother had run off with my father best friend because he made more money...she refuses to work so she got herself a sugar daddy)

the only way i got away was by moving out...and not telling here where i went.
sure she stalks me and tries to find me, but all my friends that know where i am know that she is insane...and that she is not to be talked to. so my location is still eluding her.
thats my best advice for you to deal with a mother like that...as SOON as you can get out..and never look back, never talk to her again. but be sure its a permanent situation...you dont want to get kicked back out and go crawling back to her smug little arms like i had to one time...just to have her gloat about how "i knew you would come crawling back to me one of these days...lets hope your a little bit wiser now"  so be sure its a SURE thing. save up. make friends that are also looking to move out..the more roomates you have the easier rent is to pay


but if you cant do that yet..its hard to do, but its best to play her game by her rules...do what she says, hold back the vile words you wish to spill. and wait for your day to come.
its hell having to live with that....but if you wish to survive and reserve yourself for the battles you CAN win, its best to let her think she is in control...it gets her comfortable. so that the day that you up and leave, she is on unawares how to respond and you can rid of her forever.


i know what this is like.....its hard..so if you need anything, PM me. ill talk with you
im here for you..*puts my paw on yours*...

[armagre]

the fact that your still with the dad,highschool is less stressful<HOW IS THIS STATEMENT POSSIBLE >etc etc) as hard as it may be.

highschool is less stressful than middle school the teachers leave you alone

and i try to think of the positives, it gets to be too much some times is all.

i know what this is like.....its hard..so if you need anything, PM me. ill talk with you
im here for you..*puts my paw on yours*...

yeah i remember reading your story about your family *hugs* same thing just a little but different of a beast is all.
thanks for caring, i just needed a place to vent is all.