Through Darkened Eyes

[Modemkill]

(( Greetings and salutations good Furs, I present to you today a work of mine that is still in progress.


I am writing it in a diary format, from the first person perspective of the main character, I intend for this to be quite a long story, going through his life and everything that comes with it.


I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I do writing it, any comments and constructive criticism are very welcome and always appreciated, as well as help in pointing out any spelling or grammar errors I might have missed myself.


Thanks for reading.))


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Be careful, don't stare into the abyss too long, something may look back....when I first heard these words, it sent shivers through me, right from the fur on my ears, to the tip of my tail, it seemed to embody my entire life, or at least make a sort of referral to how I had gone so horribly wrong...


Here, in this journal, I will lay out my life bare, I shall endeavor to tell the whole truth, I make no excuses for my actions, meerly give the answer as to why I took them, I will show anyone who cares to read this how I came to be who I am, and the why, and when of it.




My name is Reth, my blood name I have never known, as I was anonymously abandoned to an orphanage as a baby. Taken in by the staff there, I was raised, or, should I say dragged up, the orphanage was located in the Thenian capitol, Viccia, or, the Citadel, as it was more commonly known as. You must understand, the staff there really did try to help the children under their care, not that I saw it at the time, but it was during the period of war between the Republic of Thenia, and the Kingdom of Jihdor, tensions were high, and all resources were being funneled into the war effort against the cold blooded Jihdorians, I still remember the propaganda posters plastered all over the slums depicting the reptillian figures with red eyes and an evil grin walking forward with an outstretched claw, then you had one of the foxlike Thenian's, his back to you, facing down the approaching figure, clad in the bright red uniforms of the Republic military, the caption had read "Keep your family safe, join up today" "Family" the word had always angered me, even at that young an age. I seemed to be the only child in the orphanage who couldn't accept the fact that he'd been abandoned, and it eat at me every day.


Everything continued in mostly the same way for many years, because of the conditions, and the fact that the orphanage was located in the slums, I had grown up pretty quickly, and had become quite street smart, by the age of 14. I, unlike many of my fellow orphans, managed to avoid affiliation with the local gangs and underworld groups, not out of some kind of moral superiority, just because I always hated the idea of being a follower, I never took well to authority, of any kind.


I must confess, I don't have many distinct memories of anything up until that point, everything just seemed to mesh together into one big montage of hellish survival, or at least what I thought was hellish survival at the time...boy was I wrong, I'd had it easy until then, compared to what was coming next.


It was another side effect of the war...funding for the orphanage was withdrawn, and without it, the already poor orphanage could no longer afford to stay open. I remember it pretty clearly, I was in the room when an official, followed closely by two armed guardsmen, met with the owner, a rather large, older lady, I still remember her screaming at the man, she cried for hours afterward, she even apologized to me for "failing", at the time I couldn't have been happier, it meant an end to being stuck there.


Not long after, the orphanage was shut down, it couldn't have been more than a week or so after the incident, we were all turfed out into the streets unceremoniously, there was no sympathy for street rats like us during those hard times. Most of the other children stuck together, not knowing what to do, some went to join up with gangs they had affiliated themselves with full time....I...I just wandered, didn't really know where to go.


It had been days since I'd eaten, or slept properly for that matter, I'd been meandering from street to street aimlessly, thinking back now, maybe I was just waiting to die...but it was then that I ran into an encounter that changed me...drastically.


I remember I was coming out of one of the many dark, dingy back alleys of the slums, when I bumped into someone...when I looked up, it was another kid, maybe a year or two older than I was, obviously another street rat, and he had the most sinister grin on his face I'd yet seen...in his hands, he had a loaf of fresh bread, the kid was obviously far better off than I was, despite the fact that he was pretty much in the same boat as me.


I'll never forget it. "Hey there little cub, hungry?" the bastard waved the bread in my direction, the tone of his voice made it obvious he was teasing me, after throwing a few more insults my way, he decided he would get a bigger reaction out of me if he gave me a kick....boy, was he right. Something inside me snapped, the minute his foot made contact, I don't know if it was the starvation, the sleep deprivation, the fact that the guy was a total dick, or some darkness that had always been inside me, I suspect a mixture of all of them, but I totally lost it, I attacked the guy, claws, teeth, anything I could muster.


He was far, far more experienced than I was, and I'm sure the fact that he was well fed and rested didn't hurt either, he pummeled me, viciously, but I kept coming back for more, I didn't care, at that moment, the only thing important to me was tearing out this guys throat...while I was busy running toward the guy for the sixth time, and bleeding pretty badly while I was at it, I came to a sudden realization....I liked this...the pain, the blood-lust, the adrenaline rush, I loved it! And not only that...I was good at it! This sudden realization made me feel alive, I had never had anything I enjoyed before, and I began laughing aloud, I must have looked totally psychotic, and I probably was at the time, but this seemed to throw him off, he looked a bit frightened really, I suppose someone running at you, laughing psychotically, while covered in their own blood can be a little unnerving.


I caught him off guard, leaping at him from about three feet away, and tackling him to the ground. I punched and I punched and I clawed and I bit until the creature lying under me was barely recognizable.


Still breathing heavily, I rolled off the corpse of what was once a fellow street rat, the only thing in my mind was getting the bread he had been teasing me with...I found it, lying a little way off, and ravaged it like a wild animal without even pausing to brush off the dirt.


I felt instantly better, for a moment, I looked at the corpse I had created lying next to me, I felt no remorse, or shame, and I still don't. The guy got what he deserved, and if it hadn't been me, it would have been someone else that did him in.


As I started to calm down, I noticed something...the show had drawn a crowd, there was a good few slum dwellers nearby, looking on in shock at the scene, but I didn't care. Self defense, as far as I was concerned, besides, it's not like the law counted for much down there in the slums, I riffled through the dead guys pockets, finding a few coins, and made a hasty exit, nobody tried to follow me.




The next few days were spent in the loft of an abandoned warehouse, recovering. Once the adrenaline had worn off, the pain started to kick in, I'd been beaten pretty badly, odd as it sounds, I was extremely lucky, I came out of it with no broken bones, no bruised organs, nothing too serious. If I had, I'd probably have died, no way I'd have been able to get help from a doctor, still, it hurt like hell, and I wasn't planning on going anywhere for a while.


I managed to stagger down the street and buy some food from one of the local vendors with my ill gotten gains, it felt horrible giving up the coin, it was more than I'd ever had to my name in my life, but it meant I could eat for at least a week, and at the time, that was more valuable to me than any coin.


At the time, I remember being bored half to death, but when I think back now, it was probably an important time for me, those days of recovery, all I could think about was how much I had enjoyed the fight...how much I had enjoyed the thrill...the blood-lust, how good it felt...and that momentary feeling of pure power as I extinguished a life...I wanted more of it.


Hours upon hours were spent trying not to move too much up in those rafters, every so often, I'd eat, or get up to go relieve myself, or just try to stretch my sore muscles.




A few days later, I was feeling much better, though perhaps not quite recovered, I was asleep in my usual spot, a wide beam next to the wall, you know, where the wall meets the roof, I liked the cramped feeling it gave me. Something stirred me from my slumber however, as I awoke, I realized there was light coming from below me, down in the warehouse, I also became aware of voices, they sounded gruff.


My curiosity got the better of me, and I peeked over the side, down below, there were three figures I could make out, two were Thenian, and the other was Jihdorian, it was the first time I'd ever seen one of the cold blooded in real life, I remember the only thing I could think at the time was how little they looked like the monsters in the propaganda posters all over town.


My ears twitched as I strained to hear their hushed tones...


"...That wasn't the agreement." The larger of the two Thenian's said, the Jihdorian placed a large clawed hand on the battered looking wooden table between them all menacingly "I'll hold up my end of the bargain when you hold up yours Zariah!" "Now hold on a damn minute!" the smaller Thenian said, holding up a hand, I could see his tail swishing from side to side nervously from my vantage point "We held up our end of the bargain, there were no guards there at the appointed time, we made sure of that, cost us quite a bit too, it's not our fault if your people are too incompetent-" "My people?!" The Jihdorian boomed "We were all set to bring the packages through, when we spotted a patrol, a damn patrol, heading our way!"


Corruption in the city guard, why was I not surprised, the conversation continued on in much the same way for well over four hours, and at any moment, I expected them to kill each other, but they never did. It didn't take me long to figure out who they were, the Jihdorian was a smuggler, and the Thenians were part of a local gang, I listened to all of it, they discussed a great deal, and I learned a lot from it, they left as abruptly as they came, it did't take me long to fall back asleep, despite the chill in the air that night.




The next morning, I was awake pretty early, the sun was only just rising, I could see it through the broken roof of the warehouse, just over the rooftops of the city, I had a pretty measly breakfast, consisting of the last of the food I'd bought with my hard won money, I realized I'd have to move on soon, to where, I did not know, I was feeling a lot better now, but I had nowhere to go, nowhere to be, nobody knew who I was and nobody cared either, I had no skills, no home, nothing.


I must have sat there for hours in thought, running through all kinds of ideas, I even considered going into the Dead Zone, an extremely dangerous wasteland just north of Thenia and Jihdoria, there was supposed to be treasures untold just lying in wait, but I dismissed the thought, I'd be food for the first creature that found me, ironic really.


Eventually I decided to just take a walk, it would do my muscles some good to get some exercise, and the movement felt good, when I consider it now, I think I also secretly wanted to see if I could get into another fight, I really wanted more, even if I didn't really know it fully myself at the time.


Eternally invisible, as all street urchins are, I made my way down the market street, watching as their owners opened up shop for the day, the streets were pretty barren at that time of the morning through, not that I was complaining, I never did like crowds, I rubbed my hands together as I walked, the friction from fur rubbing against fur warming me up, it was quite cold, and the dirty rags I called clothes weren't keeping out the cold as much as I'd have liked.


As I walked, I lost myself in thought once again, I thought about my fight with the guy from a few days ago, I thought about the people in the warehouse, the Gang, and the smuggler, and I wondered if it would be possible to make a living from that kind of thing for myself, in my mind, I imagined myself wearing fine clothes, living in a palace, I was rich, I was powerful, I had everything I could ever want, I smiled to myself at the thought.


A sudden sound brought me out of my daydream, the sound of brick hitting brick, not far off, it was then I realized that I'd wandered off the market street down a back alley during the course of my thoughts, didn't matter all that much really, I had no destination in mind, but it was then that I heard voices up ahead, and it really piqued my interest.


"I got her, I got the little freak, over here!"


"Keep her there, I'm coming."


I quickened my pace, but stuck to the wall, there was nobody else around, but it was still pretty easy to hide with all the garbage lying around the alley, city waste disposal never bothered with the slums, just letting it pile up, letting the inhabitants of the slums sit in their own filth, and for once, I was thankful for it.


There were some steps leading down to the right a little further ahead, the voices were coming from there, it lead down into a large drainage pipe, the kind built for sewer access, I peeked around the corner, I could see two guys standing over something I couldn't quite make out, they were both wearing yellow jackets and yellow bandannas, they were part of a local small time gang, the Royals, or something like that, I'd seen them around before.


"Let's just kill her and get it over with." the one on the right said suddenly.


"Yeah, yeah, let's just do it quickly, I hate the smell of this place."


They started kicking, and it was then, as they moved to the side, I could see what it was, a little girl, she couldn't have been more than eight or nine, my eyes widened at the sight, and I could feel that rage start to burn in me again, and I lost it, in a fit of suicidal bravery, or perhaps stupidity, I ran out from my hiding place and straight at the backs of the two Royals, it was pure dumb luck on my part that, at the last second, I noticed a knife sticking out of the belt on the guy to my left, they hadn't even noticed me yet, too busy absorbed in their brutal torture of a small child, I made a grab for the knife, and without a second's hesitation, plunged it deep into the bastards back, he howled in pain, trying to reach behind him to grab at the source of his pain, but I was already gone, I went for the other Royal, he noticed me, but far too late, I'll never forget the look of surprise on his face as I leaped at him, I'll always be thankful that we Thenians have powerful hind legs, because it allowed me to reach his throat a lot easier than I expected to, I bit down, hard, and ripped away, then bit again, and ripped, the taste of his blood filled my mouth.


He dropped in about three seconds, choking on his own life force, I could hear him gurgling his last breath as I turned to the other guy, only to find him trying to crawl away, his own knife still protruding from the middle of his back, might have even gotten his spine, I walked over, pulled out the knife, which made him scream again, oh how I enjoyed his screams, he rolled over onto his back, when he saw me, he started to beg for his life, it was so damn pathetic, I ended him quickly, albeit with a bit more mess than I'd have liked.


They were both dead now, it was only then I remembered why I attacked them in the first place, I turned quickly, looking for the girl, and there she was, hadn't moved an inch, looking at me with wide eyes, full of fear and tears, but...for the first time, I noticed something else about her, her fur...it was pure silver....I'd just saved a Magi.


I shook my head in disbelief, I'd never even seen a magi before, they were so rare, and most of them had already been hunted to extinction by the various states, they were outlawed, abominations, dangerous, at least, that's what everyone was told, this girl didn't look the slightest bit dangerous to me, she looked frightened, helpless, and right now, pretty hurt.


I tried to smile at her, but it probably looked pretty vicious, because she flinched visibly, I forgot my mouth and chest were covered in blood from biting that guys neck, so I tried talking instead.


"You okay?"


She nodded, almost imperceptibly. I looked around, I couldn't just leave her here, the Royals would be looking for their missing people before long, and if she were still there, there was no telling what they'd do, or, even worse, the city guard might find her, and she'd be having a state execution just for being what she was. She was wearing little more than rags herself, and she looked freezing, her wounds didn't look life threatening though, just a few bruises and scrapes from where they'd beat her, I took off my own rag shirt and told her to put it on, it would pretty much cover her from her head to her knees, and it also had a hood, so it would hide her well enough, she didn't have to be asked twice.


"C'mon, I'm taking you somewhere safe." I told her, didn't take her long to comply, I suppose anywhere was better than there, and she knew it.


I carried her all the way back to my little hideaway in the loft of the abandoned warehouse, kept her bundled up in my shirt the whole time to hide her from prying eyes, I got a few funny looks myself for walking around shirtless on such a cold day, but I didn't care, their opinions meant less than nothing to me, and if I wanted to stroll around with no shirt on, that's exactly what I'd **censor** do.


The trip back took more out of me than I thought, it wasn't that she was heavy, but I was only 14, and I still wasn't exactly fully recovered myself, but we got there, after a little coercing, I managed to convince my little silver furred friend to climb up, she was afraid of heights, but there was no helping it.


I sat there for at least a good ten minutes, looking at her, and wondering what the hell I was doing, not that I had ever been one to listen to anyone else, but Magi must be considered dangerous for a reason...still, I couldn't help but feel like I could relate to her.

[Modemkill]

((I noticed there is a character limit to posts, so I'm splitting it all up into separate posts.))


"What are you doing here?" I asked her from across the...room may be a bit too generous a word, loft?

"I dunno....I can't remember how I got here..." Her words were muffled, she was sitting slouched, arms folded in front of her, and the lower half of her face was buried in the crook of her arm, though she still eyed me warily, not surprising, I doubt she'd ever met anyone she could trust in her short life.

I stood up, making my way across the think beams across to where she sat, she looked pretty alarmed, I held up my hands.

"Calm down, I just want to check your bruises, they looked pretty bad."

She shrugged, which I took as a sign to go ahead, when I looked closer at her, I was amazed, with wide eyes, I looked her in the eyes.

"They're almost gone!" She wouldn't look directly at me "I heal quick." "That's a bloody understatement!" I said with a laugh, it must have been a side effect of being born with magic running through your veins, I have to admit, I was a little jealous, still am in fact.

"So." I said, sliding down the wall to sit next to her with a sigh of relief "I never did catch your name, mine's Reth." She was silent for a bit, I was starting to wonder if she would tell me or not.

"Lina...I'm Lina..." I couldn't help but smile to myself, all that talk about Magi being monsters was a load of crap, more lies, there was nothing dangerous about Lina, granted, she was pretty damn unusual, but a monster?

"Why...did you help me?" she asked suddenly, the question caught me off guard, and I blinked in surprise "Well...why not? besides, you looked like you needed it" I tried smiling at her again, but she wasn't looking at me "Nobody's ever helped me before..." I frowned, no surprise there though, this city, this land, was full of selfish people with selfish desires, they would step on anyone to get what they wanted, I'd learned that from experience. I didn't say it, but I knew exactly how she felt.

We sat there for a while, I asked a question every so often, and she'd answer it matter-of-factly, I don't think we made eye contact once the entire time, I didn't learn a whole lot more about her, seemed she couldn't remember too much beyond running and hiding from everyone she came into contact with, she didn't know who her parents were, either they were killed for spawning a Magi, or they had simply abandoned her, neither one would have surprised me really, but I was careful not to mention that to Lina.

Not long later, it began to rain, normally, that would have been a pain, since the roof above our heads was pretty full of holes from years of neglect, but I had actually been hoping it would, my rag shirt was still covered in blood, and the water dripping down gave me the perfect means of cleaning it. I was also parched, and it gave me something to drink as well, I was pretty hungry too, but I kept that to myself, I didn't know how long it had been since Lina had eaten anything, and I had nothing to give her, so I figured it was best not to remind her. Though I did tell her she should drink some of the water, which she did, water was a great way to keep away the hunger pains.

The day was still early, but we wouldn't be going anywhere with that rain, being cold and hungry was bad enough, I didn't particularly feel like getting wet on top of that. I don't think Lina trusted me any for saving her though, she probably figured I only did it so I could claim the bounty on Magi set by the state, I have to admit, the thought did cross my mind a few times, and I seriously considered it, that reward was mighty tempting, but in the end, that was a line I wasn't willing to cross. Besides, I held no love for the authorities, and I wasn't going to help them fuel their stupid Magi hunt, regardless of the reward. No, I wouldn't be someone Lina would have to run or hide from, and hopefully, she'd figure that out, given time.

We spent the rest of the day mostly in silence, nothing of note happened, and when it got dark, I suggested that we try to get some shut eye, I promised myself I'd try to get us both some food in the morning, even if I had to steal it, I'd done it before, and I could do it again.


That night, I was once again stirred from my sleep by light below us, and sounds, were they back again? rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I rolled over, looking around, I could see Lina was fast asleep, apparently the noise hadn't disturbed her, she was probably far more exhausted than I had been. I crawled slowly to the edge and peered over, just like I'd done the night before, this time, there were no Jihdorians present, but there were four Thenians, I recognized one of them as the bigger guy from last night, Zariah, he was standing by the table in the center of the room, two others were carrying a third between them, the guy they were carrying looked pretty beat up.

"Failure" Zariah hissed suddenly "Is not something I can tolerate." The two escorts dumped the third guy on the floor near Zariah "Please...I don't know how it happened..please..." The guy sobbed through a bloody nose. "I don't want your excuses, you're pathetic." Zariah spat, making the guy flinch "Do it." He said to the other two, who grabbed him again, and dragged him toward the table, sobbing and pleading, they pinned him down on his back, and each of the escorts grabbed an arm and held it down, Zariah moved slowly around the table, pulling out what looked like a pretty crude pliers of some kind.

"You wont forget again..." He said softly, I had only barely heard it myself from up in the rafters, I watched wide eyed as Zariah proceeded to tear out the guys claws one by one, thankfully they had covered his mouth so he couldn't scream, or they'd have definitely woken Lina, it was pretty gruesome to say the least, I mean, sure, they'd grow back, eventually, and it's not like it leaves you defenseless, or crippled, but it was symbolic, and it looked pretty damn painful. Declawing, I'd heard it was used as a punishment in the local gangs, but I never thought I'd whiteness one.

They dragged him off when they were done, still whimpering and sobbing, in the back of my mind, I wondered what he'd done to deserve that, but I'd never get the chance to find out, they were gone as quickly as the night before, leaving me in darkness again.

I noticed then that the rain had stopped, looked like it had been dry for a few hours, I stood up and looked out at the streets below through one of the larger holes in the roof, low enough for me to reach, the city lay in darkness, there was still a sheen of water covering everything, clearly visible in the moonlight, a few dark figures could be seen darting from street to street, but it was otherwise deserted. I remember looking out over Citadel city that night, Lina sleeping not far away from me, wondering if I'd ever live to be happy.

[Modemkill]

I woke up before Lina that morning, sitting up, I rubbed my eyes and stretched, which promptly reminded me of the pain in my ribs. It seemed it had rained again while I was asleep, because the holes in the decrepit roof we were sleeping under were dripping water, I used some to wash my face and wake myself up, then drank some, not the cleanest, but it was free.


From the corner of my eye, I saw Lina turn in her sleep, looking over at her, I made a decision, I was going to go out and get some food before she woke up.


As quietly as I could, I climbed down the conveniently placed broken supports to the ground floor, looking at the table in the center of the room, I recalled the events of the previous night, though there was no evidence that anything had transpired here, the scene had been burned into my memory forever.


There was still a chill in the air outside, I was always surprised at how much that dilapidated old warehouse full of holes actually kept out the cold, rubbing my hands together, I shivered. It was only then that I actually began to think about where exactly I was going to acquire some food from, I had no money, and nobody was going to give any to me freely, so I decided on the only remaining option, I'd have to steal some.


Objective in mind, I made my way toward the market district at a brisk pace, I was pretty damn hungry myself, and my mouth watered at the idea of a full stomach. By now, the streets were bustling, and more than once, I had to avoid being bowled over by various people who pretended I was invisible, to the point that they would rather walk through me than acknowledge my existence. Even so, I was thankful for the crowds, it made my job a great deal easier, nothing hides a thief better than a large crowd.


As I walked, I scoped out several potential targets, a couple of fruit stalls, a stall selling freshly baked bread and pastries, two selling freshly caught fish, and one selling some rather delicious looking meat. The meat stall would have been my first choice, but standing dangerously close to it, having a casual conversation, was a group of three guardsmen, the city guard wasn't exactly renowned for it's sympathy toward street rats like me, and I didn't fancy my chances being too close to them when I stole something.


Eventually, I decided on the bakers stall, it being the one furthest from the guardsmen, and already having a nicely sized crowd around it. I waited patiently, skirting around the edges, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible, looking for my chance.


There it was, I saw it, the vendor turned away to speak to a customer, looking away from his stall, I rushed forward, grabbing two fresh loaves of bread and stuffing them haphazardly under my left arm, then turned to run, the owner of the stall had obviously seen me, because I heard shouting from behind me.


"Stop, stop, shit, somebody stop that little **censor**, he's stealing!"


I didn't look, I just ran, ran as fast as I could, bumping into several people as I went, a few times I almost fell, or lost the precious bread, but I managed to hang on to it. At one point, I felt a hand grasp me tightly on the shoulder, I lashed out in fear and anger, clawing savagely at it, I heard a cry of pain, and the hand let go.


I must have ran non stop for a good fifteen or twenty minutes, ducking through alleys and narrow streets, in hindsight, I seriously doubt he'd have chased me farther than ten feet from the stall, he had the rest of his goods to take care of, but I was paranoid as all hell. Eventually, I collapsed against a wall in one of the many alleyways in the slums, still grasping my prize tightly. My fur was damp with sweat, my heart was pounding in my chest, and I was breathing heavily, but I'd done it, I'd gotten some food.


After a quick rest, I made my way back toward my warehouse. Of course, it wasn't really mine, but I was living there, so I considered it mine. I tried to stay out of sight as much as possible, moving quickly and staying away from anyone I did see, the slums was full of desperate, hungry people, much the same as me, and the last thing I wanted was for my hard earned bread to be stolen from me by someone else.


I finally made it back, climbing the familiar pile of rubble and broken support beams, I made my way back up to the rafters again, as I poked my head up, I spotted Lina, she was already awake, sitting against the far wall, her ears perked and she looked up at me with a blank expression.


"Hey there, miss me?"


I said cheerfully, smiling.


She said nothing as I climbed up the rest of the way, then spoke.


"I thought for sure you'd gone to get the guardsmen..."


I frowned, it figures she'd have thought that, I was reminded again of how Lina must have been betrayed so many times, and how difficult it must be for her to trust anyone. I was only slightly older than she was, but I was still struck by how unfair it was for someone her age to have to endure all that hate and prejudice for something completely outside her control.


Trying to brighten the mood, I grinned, and piped up:


"I did leave to get something, but it sure as hell wasn't the guardsmen."


I held up the two loaves of bread, they were a little battered from my great escape, but they were relatively clean, and still fairly warm.


"I brought breakfast!"


Lina's eyes widened at the sight, she stared at it for a moment, mouth hanging open slightly.


"Here."


I walked over and slid down the wall to sit next to her, handing her one of the loaves, she looked at me for a moment, then at the bread, then took it tentatively.


She took a bite from it, chewed, swallowed, and, for the first time ever, I saw her smile, I couldn't help but laugh, she must have been starving, because she took another bite almost straight away.


I took a bite from my own loaf, and felt instantly better, I'd been trying not to think about how hungry I was, it felt so damn good to have something in my stomach again, the relief was tremendous.


We ate our respective meals in silence, I don't think we let a single crumb of that bread go to waste, I couldn't stop smiling, it wasn't much, but I'd managed to make sure both myself and Lina weren't going to starve today.


"You're a nice person Reth....I wish more people were like you."


Once again, Lina's words managed to catch me completely off guard, my first thought was 'no, you really don't.', but I kept that to myself, feeling a little awkward, I said jokingly:


"Heh, yeah, I'm a real hero, right?"


I felt something on my left shoulder, looking down, I realized it was Lina's head resting against it.


"You're my hero..." She said softly, before promptly slipping away into sleep. I was amazed, she'd only just woken up. Then that it hit me, she probably hadn't slept at all the night before, fear and hunger had probably kept her awake, and she was most likely feigning sleep.


I frowned, resting my head against the wall behind me, I figured I may as well try and get some more sleep myself, I didn't want to move, for fear of disturbing her, and I was feeling pretty contented after eating the bread anyway.


I closed my eyes, and after a while, felt myself slowly drifting away.


A hero eh...?


Was the last thought that ran through my mind before I entered the dreamworld.


____________________________________________


I awoke later that same day, some time in the evening by the light, as I felt movement on my shoulder, for a couple of moments, I didn't realize what was happening, then it all came flooding back at once.


Lina stood up and stretched, I made a mental note to try and acquire some better clothes for us both, the rags we were wearing had seen better days...much better.


She turned to me and smiled, for the first time I could sense that air of distrust that had enshrouded Lina since I had first met her crack open, just a little.


"Morning!"


She said in a cheery voice.


"Evening."


I replied, head cocked slightly with a half smile on my face, Lina blinked and looked confused for a moment, then looked upward through one of the various rot induced skylights in the roof.


"Right."


She said, and giggled, I couldn't help but laugh myself, which made me aware of my still bruised body once more, and also reminded me of Lina's previous wounds, looking at her then, you'd never have guessed that she had received a brutal beating just the other day, she looked perfectly healthy and fine.


Lina noticed me staring and looked at me quizzically.


"Something wrong?"


"What?...Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to stare, I'm just still amazed at how you heal so quickly, I'm kind of jealous really, could use some of that myself."


I laughed again, unconsciously lifting my hand and scratching the back of my neck as I did so.


I stopped abruptly as I noticed Lina striding toward me, she stopped, and dropped on her haunches in front of me, placing two hands on my chest.


I looked at her with a raised eyebrow.


"What are you-"


My mouth was agape, my eyes wide in disbelief, her hands, they were glowing, for a second I was afraid, then I felt it, like soothing, warm water was gently sweeping over my whole body, the pain I felt, my injuries, they just disappeared, magic, healing magic.


The glowing stopped, and Lina retracted her hands, I looked up at her, utter shock and surprise on my face.


"I-I'm sorry, I should have asked, I just-"


I interrupted her, grinning broadly.


"Lina, that was absolutely amazing!"


I jumped to my feet, I looked at my hands first, then down at my sides, my legs, they were all gone, the bruises, the cuts, even the tiny scratches had been healed, I felt better than had ever done before in my life.


"Thank you Lina, I can't thank you enough."


I said to her with the broadest grin I could muster. She blushed madly and avoided eye contact.


"I just thought...since you said...you know..."


She suddenly looked at me, a cheeky smile on her face.


"Of course, I am a powerful Magi after all."


I blinked a few times, then we both burst out laughing together.


I will never forget that moment for the rest of my life, Lina was the first person in my life I had ever considered to be a friend, and right then, at that very moment, for the first time I could remember, I felt real happiness.




The next day, Lina had expressed her wish to come with me next time I went out to steal us some food, I figured it wasn't such a great idea to bring her out in public, but I didn't have the heart to tell her no, I knew from experience how boring it was sitting in the loft of the warehouse all day every day, so I came up with an idea.


From the shed of the local tannery, I stole some dye, the idea was for Lina to use some to change her fur color at least temporarily, she had wanted to be brown, like me, but I managed to convince her that dying her silver fur grey would be a much easier process.


It turned out to be easier than I expected honestly, Lina applied the dye to her head, neck, hands, arms, legs and feet, though I had to help her with the back of her head and neck. I was proud of my wonderful idea, it looked great, if you didn't already know she was a Magi, and weren't looking too closely, all you'd see is just one more street rat with common grey fur, and nobody ever looked too closely at street rats, we were invisible to most.




Not long after, Lina and I were back in the market district once more, on the main street, throngs of people crowded the street at this time, getting in their last purchases before the stalls closed for the night.


We still had a bit of the bread I'd stolen that morning back at the warehouse loft, so it wasn't food we were after this time, no, we had a different target, I had decided to check off the mental note I made for myself earlier, we were going to steal some clothes, some decent clothes.


I already had the stall marked in my mind, I had spotted it from a distance, near the end of the main street, it was a fairly big stall with a slightly overweight owner standing just to the right side, trying to entice passers by to peruse his wares.


I nodded to Lina, she nodded back with a serious face, we had already worked out the plan earlier, she would distract him while I took some clothes from the far side of the stall, it was a simple but sound strategy.


We separated as we neared the stall, I veered off to the left while Lina made her way toward the stall owner, she approached him and tugged at his coat, pulling his attention away from the stall.


I had walked by, and when he turned to face her, quickly darted behind the stall on the far side, quick and nimble, I was riffling through the various garments even before Lina spoke.


"Please sir...I'm so hungry, can't you spare a few coppers?"


Wow, she was good, I was worried she might not be up for this, but her acting was remarkable.


Scarves, I grabbed two, coats, too big, too small, there, I grabbed two, throwing them over my shoulder.


"What the? Bugger off kid, will you?"


Asshole, about what I expected. Pants, grabbed them, I wanted the gloves, but they were too far in to risk going for. there were some shirts, they were far too big for either of us, but I grabbed them anyway.


"Please sir, I just want some bread...I haven't eaten in days, I'm so hungry..."


Lina continued, she really did sound pitiful, I had to struggle not to laugh.


"Oh for- Fine, here, now get out of here, I'm busy."


Now that I did not expect, the stall owned pulled out some coins and handed Lina a few of the smaller copper ones. I took that as my cue to leave, and took off running into an alley a little ways off before the owner had the chance to turn around and spot me.


I waited ten or twenty meters up there for Lina, we had agreed to meet there afterward, after a few minutes, I saw her turn down the alley and come running toward me, she was beaming, so was I.


"I can't believe how well that went!"


I said with a laugh, Lina nodded her agreement, slightly out of breath. I looked over what I'd gotten.


"Well, I didn't get the gloves or hats I wanted, but I got just about everything else. We should change here, we don't want to carry this stuff through the slum district."


Lina went behind one of the numerous large piles of trash and refuse to change, and I changed on the other side of it. After a while, she emerged, and I tried, but failed to stifle a laugh, she frowned at me, the shirt she was wearing looked more like a long dress on her, it was way too long, but then, so was mine.


"Okay, okay, hang on, I can fix this."


I said, still laughing a little, I rummaged through the refuse pile until I found what I was looking for, a jagged piece of metal, it would do the trick nicely.


I carefully used it to cut a strip of cloth from the bottom of my own shirt, then wrapped the strip of cloth around the bottom part of the jagged steel,  it was no real knife, but it would suffice.


I went to Lina and cut the excess cloth off her shirt, so that it only reached her waist, then did the same for the arms, so the sleeves only reached her elbows, it was still kind of loose on her, but the thick coat she donned held it in place.


"Thanks!"


She said, shooting me another of her bright smiles.


"Don't mention it."


I replied. I did the same for my own shirt, discarding the excess cloth there in the alley. So now, with our new shirts, pants and coats, and scarves, we were much better off than we were before, I could already feel the warmth, a sensation I had all but forgotten. I decided to pocket my new makeshift knife, it fit nicely into an inside pocket of my coat, we took one last look at the moldy, grey rags we had left on the trash pile that used to be our garments and I smiled, things were looking up.


We made our way back to the warehouse and climbed back up to the loft, Lina had gotten over her previous fear of heights apparently, because she zipped up the rubble and broken beams about as fast as I did, thinking back, it was probably me she was afraid of at the time, not the height.


The light was fading rapidly by the time we got back, we sat by the low hole and watched the sun set as we talked, a little later on we ate the remainder of the bread we had kept, we talked more, and laughed, about silly things I can't even remember now, but we had fun.


Eventually we got tired and decided to head to sleep, I took one last look out the hole into the night sky, I could see all the stars, there were no clouds tonight, it would be a rain-less night.


I curled up in my usual corner, where the wall met the roof, and Lina came and curled up beside me, I could see my breath in the cold air, but between our new clothes, and Lina beside me, with one arm draped over me, I would fall asleep for the first time in many weeks, happy, full and warm

[Modemkill]

Several weeks passed by with very little of note occurring, we stayed living in the loft of the old warehouse, it served us well, and there seemed to be no reason to leave it. I kept stealing food, supplies, even a little money, Lina helped me too, we were a good team, and we were only getting better at it. We had some good times, and some close calls, but we were never caught.


I was starting to gain a bit of a reputation in the slums, and in the market district, which, as it turned out, was both a good thing, and a bad thing, after a while, the stall keepers began to notice me coming, this, of course, made my job a lot harder, and worse yet, even the guard were breaking their long standing tradition of pretending street rats don't exist and started keeping a close eye on me whenever they could spot me.


This one particular day was sunny and bright, unusually so for the Citadel, Lina and I were walking back toward the warehouse, carrying our newly acquired bag of fresh apples and, to our pride, a jingling bag of coin, we were laughing and talking.


"Did you see his face?"


I managed to ask through my laughter, Lina nodded, I thought she was going to start crying she was giggling so hard.


"I thought he was going to die, I could see the veins in his neck even from where I was!"


We were talking about the rather fat guardsman who had found himself in the unenviable position of having to try and catch us after the stall keeper had shouted when we stole the apples and coin, he'd been alone nearby and forced to give chase, we'd almost wound up caught by him several times because we couldn't stop laughing, the sight of him exerting his way down the side alleys after us, trying to keep his flab inside his hauberk was almost too much to bear, but in the end, we lost him in the maze of the slums


"I can't believe that tub of lard managed to run for so long" I said with a grin, cocking my head to the side to look at Lina as we walked.


"I kind of felt sorry for him you know, he looked so desperate." she replied, this wiped the grin off my face, and I looked forward again before replying.


"Don't ever feel sorry for them Lina, they're scum, that same guard probably took several bribes today, beat a defenseless prisoner, and he'd have beaten us to within an inch of our lives if he's caught us."


Lina looked pensive for a moment, then replied simply.


"Okay."


"Good!" I said with a laugh. "Come on, let's get home so we can see what we've got."


I was so lost in my jovial mood that I almost didn't notice him, I stopped dead, putting an arm out to stop Lina as well, she bumped into it, then looked up at me in confusion, then, seeing me staring, she turned her gaze where I was looking.


There, a few meters ahead, shoulder leaning against the wall of one of the run down buildings in the narrow alley was a Thenian youth, he looked roughly the same age as I did, grey fur, he had his legs and arms crossed, he was wearing little more than rags and foot wraps, his face was impassive, but his eyes were locked onto mine.


In the slums district, there was an unwritten rule, if you wanted to avoid confrontation, you avoided eye contact, and this guy clearly wanted something.


"What do you want?!" I said with a growl, Lina edged back and behind me a little.


The youth took a moment and pushed off from the wall, standing straight, then spoke.


"You're Reth, right?"


I felt the heckles on the back of my neck rise, I was sure there was going to be violence, I was ready for it....more than that, I was looking forward to it, I said nothing, but narrowed my eyes. The youth raised his hands in front of him, palms forward, the universal sign of peace, I relaxed, but only slightly, for all I knew, he was here to take what was ours.


"My name is Dekatus, but everyone who knows me calls me Dek, I didn't look for you for a fight."


"Then what do you want?" I asked, a little less aggressively, but not the least bit more friendly, my barbed tone of voice seemed to do little to deter him.


"I've heard about you, you're starting to get a bit of a reputation around here you know, there's all sorts of rumors flying about"


This much I already knew, it had been painfully obvious from the increased difficulty in stealing from the market stalls, but this still didn't tell me what this Dekatus fellow wanted.


"You haven't answered my question." I stated bluntly, he looked at me for a moment, then replied.


"Isn't it obvious..? I want to work for you."


I was taken aback, it took me a moment to register what he'd said, then, I had to struggle not to let out a laugh, this seemed ludicrous, someone wanted to work for me?


"Excuse me?" I said with a half laugh I couldn't suppress.


"Just like I said, I want to work for you" he repeated "I want you to teach me, and in return, I'll work for you, I'll be your man, all I ask is my fair share."


I shook my head in disbelief "Why? I'm hardly better off than you are."


He pointed to my pocket "That coin purse you so quickly hid when you saw me says otherwise." I mentally flinched, I thought I'd hidden it before he could see it.


Dekatus took a couple of steps forward, I could feel the heckles on the back of my neck raising again, and I felt Lina tightening her grip on my arm, she'd been silent the whole time.


"I know a rising star when I see one"


He gave me a grin, it was the first time I'd seen his facial features change once since we met him.


"If I grab on tight enough, you may well pull me to the heavens along with you."


I don't know why I did it, or why I felt like I might be able to trust him, but I reached into my pocket and pulled out the coin bag, I opened it, looking inside, there was more money in there than I'd anticipated, a lot more. I pulled out a few coins and handed them to Dek.


"Take this, go buy yourself some better clothes, then come meet us." I gave him quick directions to the warehouse, he beamed at me, taking the coins, then stood as straight and proud as he could.


"You wont regret this Reth, I swear it."


I hoped so, I really did, but I just nodded, then watched him run off in the direction we had come from.


"Come on" I said flatly to Lina.


It only took us a few minutes to get back to the warehouse, once we were once again up in the familiar rafters we had come to know as home, Lina spoke up.


"Why'd you do it? what if he just runs off with the money and never comes back?"


Legitimate questions, I wasn't sure I knew myself, it had felt like the right thing to do at the time, but now, I wasn't so sure.


"I don't know." I answered honestly "If he doesn't come back, we know he was lying through his muzzle, and we'll only have lost a few coins, better than our blood in a meaningless struggle." I answered less than honestly, I was actually a little disappointed that it hadn't ended in violence, my previous struggles were never far from my mind, how much I enjoyed the fight, the blood, the adrenaline, the killing.


"Don't worry." I said, giving Lina one of my most charming smiles, for what that was worth, it seemed to do the trick, she smiled back and seemed to relax.


"With what we got today, we shouldn't have to worry for quite a while."


I pulled out the bag, then spilled the contents out in front of me, there was a small pile of copper, silver, and even a few pieces of gold in there, it was quite a sum, the store keeper wasn't going to forget this loss easily, I made a mental note to avoid his general area for a while.


Both of our eyes light up at the sight, with this, we could eat for a long time, we could buy the things we needed, there were so many possibilities, we counted it between us, then stashed it away safely.


I grabbed an apple from the bag we'd managed to steal and tossed Lina one, she caught it deftly and bit into it with vigor, I followed suit, it was sweet, juicy, delicious, I savored it, eating away at it until I had almost eaten the core itself, then I tossed it out the gaping hole in the roof we were sitting beside, smiling as I imagined it hitting some hapless passer by on the head.


Hours passed, and I had almost forgotten all about Dekatus, Lina and I were chatting and joking and laughing, we always got on so well, it felt so natural, so easy. I felt a jolt of apprehension when I heard the heavy, rotting wooden door on the ground floor opening, Lina and I both went silent, and peered over the edge.


In walked Dekatus, looking around in confusion, he was almost unrecognizable in new clothes, he'd picked well, thick winter clothes, despite the warm day, he knew he would need them come the cold season. We watched him for a moment, he looked around, sighed, lifted his arms and let them flop back down at his sides, then sighed again, I looked at Lina and grinned, then put my fingers to my lips and let out an ear splitting whistle.


Dekatus almost fell over in shock, then looked up, eyes wide in fright, then he spotted me, and let out a laugh.


"You ass!" He said "How did you get up there?"


I grinned back down at him, I was relieved to see him, to see I had been right, but most of all, to know that there was someone else in this hole apart from Lina and myself that could be trusted, if only a little.


I pointed to the rubble and broken rafters by the wall.


"C'mon Dek, hurry up, we've got a lot to talk about."