Please take this as something constructive as that is the intention.
The best way to change your personality is to make that change in your personality.
Commit to the change you intend to make. Analyze every detail before you jump into any situation. Consider multiple perspectives. You can't see what's behind a building unless you walk around to the other side. Whomever the important person is should be doing the same. If you cannot speak to the person and come to an agreement give it some time and space. If still nothing, the best thing you can do at that point is to move on. (ONLY MOVE ON ONCE YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY SURE THAT THE OTHER FEELS LIKE YOU SHOULD NO LONGER COMMUNICATE. IF THERE IS SILENCE DON'T TAKE IT AS THE END. CHECKING BACK UP IS THE BEST WAY TO CONVEY THAT YOU ARE STILL VERY MUCH CONCERNED OR REMORSEFUL FOR ACTIONS THAT HAVE BEEN TAKEN. ONCE YOU GET THE, "I'm done" You will know that its best to stop there before it escalates)
A cycle cannot be broken unless you make the decision to break it. To simplify, make a square with 4 even sticks. Take away a stick. You no longer have a square. This is because you made the choice to remove the stick. No one on these forums can do this or provide a way for you:
"i just want a way to stop it so i can have a normal personality again and NOT come off as a over-aggressive turd..."
The above quote is obviously something only you can do. Personality is not a tangible thing. No one can take your personality and manipulate it into something better for you. It all lies on your shoulders. Nothing is irreversible when it comes to how you act. It is impossible to go back in time and correct the wrongs you may have commited, HOWEVER, there is always the possibility to change how you will act from that point onward.