Valedictorian, my ass.

[Keinai]

My stepmom is forcing me to take all AP core classes and join a bunch of clubs/extras so I have a much greater chance at being chosen as a valedictorian. She says if I'm a valedictorian then I can go to a lot more colleges, get scholarships, ect.


On top of AP work, I also do a lot of strenuous sports and training, and I hike and camp for days and even up to weeks on end during the summer and winter breaks. I also am first chair French Horn and I've made All State in all of middle school and high school, so I'm dedicated to music too. So I'm doing a lot for the school


I'm also Vice President of German Club and I'm in National Honor Society.




I mean, it's not that I'm not capable of being chosen. But all of this pressure to do well is really putting me on edge. And I know if I don't make it then my stepmom will think it's because I'm trying to defy her instead of the administrators' decision. So I'm really putting in my best effort so I can please her, but at the same time it's draining me and driving me insane. I still have to focus on learning Croatian and bettering my English but it's hard to do that when I have so much work to do.


I think part of the reason I don't want to be picked is because it's something my stepmom is forcing me to do.
Whenever my stepmom forces me or my stepbro to do something she expects it to benefit her in the end. That's why we've played so many sports, because she wants to show us off like pets and make all of her co-workers wish their kids could be like us.


I don't know, I think it would be great to be picked but at the same time it's too late for me to back out of my classes. I love all of the activities I'm in, I've become pretty good at balancing them out, but it's too much work and it's physically and emotionally taxing.

[NautilusWolf]

It may look good on paper. All AP, valedictorian, this/that/what have you, but I'm the kind of person to draw the line when it takes a toll on someone. If it's become unhealthy to bear that burden, then you should stop. It's a bit late as of now, but maybe ease up the workload next year? Do as much as you're comfortable with.

Is pleasing someone worth your health? Not to me. Your health comes first. You ever gotta talk about it, you know where to find me. ^~^

[Keinai]

Yeah, I may take fewer AP classes net year, but I'm a junior so the real workload is this year, but if I pull through then senior is gonna be hella fun.


I just want to go to college, get a job, and live my life how it will be. I don't care about Harvard or Yale or wherever, I just need college education.


I may have to drop Judo until the summer, as much as I love it, but I've already paid for boxing gym membership and my stepmom will kill me if I drop gymnastics. I'll try rearranging my schedule to allow more relaxing time too.


Thanks. ^-^

[Growlithe]

Do what makes the most sense for your career path. If you want to do something in the field of engineering, then knowing how to play french horn won't assist you nearly as much as an AP mathematics course. Similarly, being valedictorian is not of huge importance - I have gone to a far better college than my high school's valedictorian and for far less, but it literally doesn't matter. It's about what is best for you and your career. My impression, and perhaps it's mistaken, is that high school grades are to prove one can do the awful busy work associated with learning, the test scores are to show one's capabilities, and the extracurricular activities show how involved with the learning process one is willing to be. Doing well certainly helps, but it isn't everything. Just do what you're capable of and you'll be fine, Being forced to stretch yourself isn't going to do nearly as much good as wanting to stretch yourself, and her forcing you to do this is unhealthy. If she's strongly suggesting it, perhaps she thinks she's just being helpful, but that behavior from my mom is what really drove us apart. It's not her life and she shouldn't live it for you. That being said, she is just trying to help and it's important to keep that in mind. I wouldn't want that to be a point of conflict for you as well if you can avoid it.

[White Wolf Guardian]

Don't fall into the AP trap. Get a 4.0 with regular classes OR get your GED in the first 2 years, go to junior college and take care of general education as fast as possible. AP is worthless if you do not: Get a 3 or 4 on the test AND get an A in the class. You're wasting time and money.

Think about it this way:

Take a super hard version of a normal college class for 9 months straight with 5 other classes at the same time.

OR

Take the same class, get an A, pay nothing for the test, and finish it in 4 MONTHS in junior college. You can even take some classes in THREE WEEKS.

Fact: Taking 18 credits in any college prior to a university transfer instantly becomes a representation of your GPA. Do not fall for the AP scam!

[Keinai]

I keep telling my stepmom that colleges look at the arts and sports more than your classes, but she doesn't believe me.


Just whatever, I can handle the work for the rest of the school year. I'm doing well now so I'll just ask my guidance counselor next year to switch out the classes my stepmom signed me up for--at least the ones I know I won't need or I'm not interested in.

[NautilusWolf]

Do what's right for you. Ride out this rest of the year then it should be smooth sailing after. ^~^

[Silentium Potens]

I personally find that the getting good grades, going all out with honor society, and other similar stuff is overrated.  Now, that doesn't mean that it's useless or you should ignore it, but realize that there are many more things to consider.  Just because you get good grades doesn't mean you have the work ethics or the morals to accomplish responsibilities in the real world.  I've heard of valedictorians from my high school that ended up dropping out of college.  All of the honor society students from my high school that attend the college I go to aren't in any better position than I am, and in many cases are doing worse since they're getting involved with nasty stuff such as drugs.  I personally haven't done extracurricular activities, but I did manage to get good grades and snagged some college credit in high school.  And here I am at a reasonably good, fairly competitive college with good grades, on track to becoming an engineer.

I guess another way to think of it, its a massive bragging contest that doesn't go anywhere.  Understand your goals, understand how to accomplish them, then focus on doing so.  Good grades should be a symptom of your success, not the reason for your success.

And Wyte is right, the AP stuff is a huge scam.  I've known many people who took those courses and got very little out of it.  They slaved for these overly difficult classes and ended up failing the finals, so they got nothing out of it.

Edit:  minor errors.

[Keinai]

Sorry my stepmom is a neurotic control freak. I agree with what you say wholeheartedly but it's too late to back out. I enjoy the activities I'm in, and in my AP classes I really feel like I'm learning something and not just doing busy work. It's just a lot.

[Silentium Potens]

You're saying that you can't back out?  Sorry, but I don't quite understand.

[Keinai]

After the first quarter of the year it's too late to switch classes.


Technically you can but you have to get a lot of stuff signed by administrators, and my stepmom will have my head if I tried to change.

[Silentium Potens]

Ahhh I see.  Yea, that's a pain.

I can't give much advice for that, except to bunker down and complete what needs to be done.  If you can make periods of time to relax, do so.  It helps out a lot.  And if you can get friends to help in with your work (e.g. study with a good friend or two), do that as well, as it will ease the pain.  Trust me, I'm helping a friend of mine who is swamped in work right now.  He likes when we study because not only do I help him out a lot, but we're also technically hanging out.

You already said that you would have a lighter load come senior year, right?  Well as others have suggested, and as I will also suggest, get to a manageable work load.

[Yena the Wolf]

Keinai, I hate your step mom. Please, either run away, tell the cops, something! Don't go through this!