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Author Topic: I'm now terrible because I didn't do anything  (Read 527 times)

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Offline N.y.r.o

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I'm now terrible because I didn't do anything
« on: October 31, 2016, 05:36:04 AM »
I got angry at one of my online friends yesterday because in the chat they were doing the "without context" moody thing (aka making their username "." and going do not disturb). They've done this in the past and it's a major peeve of mine. Like, whenever it happens, it puts me in a bad mood, and I absolutely hate it when other people's moodiness rubs off on me. Like, if you're upset, then either actually TALK about it or just go offline. Since at this point I was so fed-up with them doing it, I kind of got a bit frustrated and then when they went offline for a second I wrote an angry message (which maybe I shouldn't have done, but I was so sick and tired of them doing it. It seems like an attention thing to me and I don't like being in a bad mood, especially because of other people). Well when they came back online I just closed the app and I haven't opened it since.


Of course not too long after they delete their tagline on DeviantArt (which, knowing them, is a sign of passive aggression). By later that night they were acting fine again, and they even made their DeviantArt account look really impeccable (just a humour thing). Everything seemed fine. I haven't actually done anything online today though (well on DA anyway, or any art sites really), mainly because I have been at work the entire day, and I carved a pumpkin tonight. Well, turns out doing nothing is horrible! Because I go back to see they have hidden a comment they left on my page today and deleted most of the stuff on their profile and made their tagline "Thanks." LIKE, WHAT THE HECK DID I DO. I AM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING-


*deep breath*


I'm so sick of everything right now, and this person has ticked me right off.
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Offline Rocco Rex

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Re: I'm now terrible because I didn't do anything
« Reply #1 on: November 01, 2016, 12:28:22 AM »
Not trying to sound mean or anything, but sounds like you might have a bit of an issue with anger (I'm very guilty in that respect). I suggest you just put that other person out of your mind for now and go do something you enjoy. Then later, once you've cooled down, assess the situation from a neutral point of view and decide what to do.

Offline N.y.r.o

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Re: I'm now terrible because I didn't do anything
« Reply #2 on: November 01, 2016, 01:17:19 AM »
Not trying to sound mean or anything, but sounds like you might have a bit of an issue with anger (I'm very guilty in that respect). I suggest you just put that other person out of your mind for now and go do something you enjoy. Then later, once you've cooled down, assess the situation from a neutral point of view and decide what to do.


I'll be honest, I do kind of have a bad temper . . . and it has gotten me in trouble before, and I have admitted to some bad things I've done in the past, and I don't want them to repeat themselves. I think I have cooled off a bit by now. I just wish this person would stop doing these weird moody things because it affects others around them, and being someone with a short temper and not much patience, it's not really the best for me to be around someone like that. (I also don't like things that are unpredictable, and those random mood swings are unpredictable).
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Offline Ventus Fall

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Re: I'm now terrible because I didn't do anything
« Reply #3 on: November 01, 2016, 07:51:29 PM »
Not to sound mean myself here :)
While I agree sometimes when other people do something it can be upsetting or even frustrating. There are however some points which are confusing. For example, you mention they should go offline but at the same time when they finally do this, it's also not what's right. It feels rather conflicting to me.

I would suggest talking to and with people if something is annoying you directly, and if you feel this person has an issue with you. I mean, everyone deals with issues in their own way, but that they'd go so far as to delete stuff on their profile on dA, and leave a hidden comment seems really odd. As well as the rather passive-aggressive 'Thanks'. Not sure if it was meant or directed to you, but once again, I would suggest speaking to them. Not arguing or anything, just calmly asking and wondering why they have done that, and that they could handle the situation perhaps differently.
If it has to do with how you acted, then listen to them, ask them what you could then do differently.

Often in such situations it's that people don't communicate properly with one another. If someone has a problem with another, they should try to handle it immediately and directly, but calm and collectively.

Not sure if any of this helps, but try to talk with each other, see what's up and how to prevent these sort of situations in the future. If this person upsets you too much, either learn how to deal with how they (re)act, or keep your distance from them/break off contact.
Personally I would say first try to address the issue and work on it before taking drastic measures.
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