*an announcement plays over the PA system and the television sets, the man on the television was donning what looked like winter attires, and had his hair styled in a small ponytail* "Brothers and sisters. The age of man is at an end. We have become too many with too little to go around. Corporations that we once trusted with our money have squandered it. The governments that we once trusted with our future have sabotaged it. To their eternal credit, we are dying. But fear not, for there is a future. As promised by the prophet, Michael Altman, the Black Marker has a plan- for all of you. It will lift us from our miserable existence, and we will become one, united in body and united in spirit. Our unity will be our salvation. We will live on, not as men, but as God. The Church of Unitology is waiting for you, my friends. Throw off the chains of this life and join us as the new one begins. I'm Jacob Arthur Danik. And I am this message." *the broadcast cuts to static and begins again*
*A puzzled look flashes across Dubaku's face* What in the hell?