Getting ready to blow a gasket

[Wolfgang]

yeah, the title is self explanatory, but there is this one kid that always seats near my group of friends at lunch and I swear to god I just want to hit him with something heavy. All he ever does at the lunch table is make gay jokes at me and my friends. He thinks he's cool but he's an idiot who needs to keep his mouth shut. He always talks about sexual things and makes jokes about them like he's in 7th grade, Grow the heck up! Another thing about him is that he smells like B.O. There's a brand new invention and it's called soap, try using it. I find it rather sad that he's in the 11th grade and he doesn't have a girlfriend. My friend who is more pleasurable to be around just got a girlfriend, he's a bit goofy but he doesn't crack jokes of the sexual nature. As I said before he's a goofball and he's funny, and he doesn't stink like B.O.

Does anybody know a good way to get rid of a parasite like the kid i just described?

[Philly Tanuki]

Start saying things to him that won't bother him at first but will eat at him.  I usually say some stuff to confuse someone I don't, and other times I just come right out and tell a person to shutup and go away.  It usually works.  Another thing I do is whenever I see someone I don't like I put an angry look on my face and act like I'm frustrated and they usually stay away.  It's fantastic stuff.

[Heorot]

There are a few things I would do. I'm crap at problem solving though. lol.

My first course of action would to be ignore him. Not in the "I can't hear you, lalalala!" way, in the "You don't exist on planet Earth" kind of way. If he starts making jokes and doin that mean, stupid crap - just talk straight through it. But it kinda sounds like you've been trying that. Soooooo,

Step 2. Tell him to quit. If he doesn't the first time, really tell him to quit. If he persists, inform him that he's an idiot and say something along the lines of "You stink, have you heard of soap?" That /should/ embarrass him enough to make him quit.

Step 3, worse case-scenario, inform your parent(s) that he's a jerk and they you're absolutely gunna deck him. Then do it. ^-^

The third step is kinda a joke. lol Like I said, I'm not very good at that. But I try. =)

[Armalite_]

My advice for this kind of stuff would to usually just beat him up in the parking lot but since this is a place where i shouldn't suggest that, I'd say...get a bunch of your friends and go "confont" him.

[AirRaiser]

If he knows it bothers you and your friends, he'll continue. There really isn't anything you can do, past giving in and giving him the power to provoke you. Trust me it's not easy to show that it doesn't bother you. As for the smell, your on your own. All you can really do for that is hand him some soap and ask him if he's ever heard of it.

Um it's not odd to not have a boy friend/girl friend no matter what grade your in. I didn't have an actual boyfriend till the spring of 12th grade.

Other then that, you have to be the bigger person. Nothing you really do will matter, it will just make it worse. OR it will turn on you, and you'll become the bad guy. Yes people suck, yes they will take anything about someone who's got it better then them, and turn it around to make themselves look better to others.

I dunno, it's not easy, and you have to go through the worst of it before it will get better.

[Sareen]

All I ever do when people make these type of things towards me, I just agree with it or make a joke about it, Just show it doesn't bother you, because the only reason he is carrying on doing it is because he can probably see and sense that it is bothering you, if you act like it doesn't he'll soon get tired of the fact your not getting upset by it and soon he'll leave you alone. I know it sounds stupid and strange but it works trust me =P

[Alice The Necrofox]

I think they just came out with a spray for something like that.