you dont need to were a collar to be a furry ... most of us dont where one. i where mine when iam a lone and iam going to where it when iam with other furs, dont where it around her then hide it from her. mine dont like me wherein one because of how it makes me look according to my mom.
if you say your a furry then your a furry .. just tell her your a furry show her some art ( if she want to see it) and say this is what beeing a furry is mostly about.