I don't exactly know what is right and what is wrong in this scenario. I have pretty much discovered that I like people feeling sorry for me, therefore that makes me an egotistical maniac, at the same time, apparently, that's ok, because you help people to make them happy, and when they help you it makes you happy, that's how it works. But then, my brother, is all clinically depressed, who uses me as an example of a super happy person, who then continues to use this "your so lucky you are happy" and such, which annoys me significantly. Am I happy? Am I always happy? Why do I feel BAD about being happy!? This idea is a bit too confusing to really grasp myself, but I feel quite sad right now, quite sad because I'm being a total hypocrite, selfish egotistical maniac. Today, all it seems I've done is annoy people on the internet, ask stupid questions, do stupid things like this. Unable to help anyone, but still seeking help myself, who to talk to, who not, this is ridiculous.
Do I even deserve help?