I've been pretty up front with people that I have concerns about lately and I feel weird and kind of a jerk about it because I never used to be up front at all; I was a coward and just brush things under the rug. For example my friend that got out of rehab 2 or 3 months ago for drug and alcohol abuse wanted to hang out with me and she found my parents stash of wine, my mom see's her eyeing it and asks her if she wants some (My parents are okay with me drinking as long as we are drinking responsibly and just once a month). I was kind of hesitant of the choice my mom was making, but I guess a little wouldn't hurt my friend. After me, my friend and my mom finished our small glass of wine, my mom brings out the tequila. We 3 got drunk, it was fun but I'm a bit mad that my mom was doing this just to look like a cool parent and my friend might go on the wrong path again. So my friend started asking to come over and kept asking if we have alcohol, and I just had to say something. "I feel like you just coming over to intoxicate yourself...I'm trying not to judge, but this needs to stop. I'm concerned about you and I don't want your dad blaming us if you go back to the path you are going down. Most importantly, as I said, I'm concerned about you." I said. She kind of felt bad and that made me felt bad. Numerous amount of people at school know about her drug abuse and I didn't want to seem like the others that look down upon her. I don't look down upon her at all, she is a wonderful spiritual person and the only out going person I can stand. I just don't want her to think I do. I told her that I don't but I heard what she had to say about it's hard to quit once you have the addiction. I've never had to discuss it; I don't know how to talk to her about it without seeming judgmental. With drug users and alcoholics, I don't like to judge because some do it due to sever depression and I can relate to the depression and wanting to put yourself in danger and I can understand to want a substance that can make all those bad feelings go away. Anyway sorry for the long thing... I just hope me being up front is more of a positive thing than a bad, I guess it depends on the perspective on the person I'm being up front with.