*looking out at the ocean, i started to feel more relaxed. whenever i feel like i'm going to punch anyone and anything, i walk out and look at nature. i feel a presence behind me on the balcony, but i ignore it. if joker came to apologize, i would listen to him first, not speak right away. i know he loves me, but still, i can't help being who i am, and maybe getting a lil sad once in a while. i go and find a horse in a random stable and i ride along the coast for a little bit.*