Asexual?

[Dagmar1177]

Ok so I've seen a couple people on here say or a least claim to be Asexual. I recently took a college level psychology course so when I think of asexuality the literal definition in my head is as follows: *clears throat* Asexuality is generally defined as a lack of sexual attraction to others or the lack of interest in sex. When you look at its a pretty nebulous term. I'm not claiming that people who claim to be are lying or don't know what there talking about. Far from it, what I wanna know is what it means to those people. I have no way to grasp the concept honestly. I find the concept genuinely fascinating and I say that at the risk of sounding like a mad scientist.

[Goblin Cat 😸]

 It's not really nebulous at all. Asexuality is literally not experiencing sexual attraction to anyone. I'm not sure how that is nebulous, nor am I sure how an asexual person is supposed to explain it further than that.

 
Also you may want to look at how you describe your interest in this sort of thing, as I do not appreciate coming off as being some sort of mythical creature, or something for you to pick at. If someone claims to be asexual, they are asexual and that's all there is to it. Even if you didn't intend your words to sound offensive saying that we claim to be asexual makes it seem as if you don't quite believe that we are. I guess I'm picking at semantics now, but wording is important.

 
Even still, you'll likely never grasp the concept unless you yourself are asexual – just like you'll never know what it's like to be black unless you're black and you'll never know what it's like to be trans unless you're transgender.

 
Again, while I'm not entirely sure how I'm supposed to break it down further than the definition you've got there, I can say that being asexual to me is like eating ice cream. Some people crave ice cream. Some people consider it their favorite thing. Some people don't crave it at all. That doesn't mean they don't like ice cream or won't eat it. They just don't crave it and could live without it.

[Dagmar1177]

My Apologizes sincerely I have seen someone describe themselves a asexual straight which I felt was a bit of an conundrum. I don't intend to offend when I ask questions and I don't view asexuality as a mythical creature it is however a rare mindset, occurrence whatever you want to call it. though as a bit extra from my own perspective don't ever take whatever I ask as an offensive question I often time have to explain being a furry to someone and the first thing they think is oh you like to have sex with animal. It's such a common misconception I've literally become numb to it their ignorance isn't their fault they've just never encountered the problem before. I the kind of person who believe that obtaining knowledge never hurt anyone it's what they did with it, so as I grow deeper into adulthood I like to try and grow better understanding of thing even if I can't grasp the concepts entirely. Again sorry if this was taken the wrong way I was just a bit curious and may have gone a bit overboard.

[Goblin Cat 😸]

 Well, there are different facets of attraction, aside from the sexuality aspect. You have have gender preference even while being asexual and you can also have romantic or aromantic preferences. Even as an asexual, some people still crave a romantic relationship with others, and may get into another relationship with someone for romantic reasons – meaning that their relationship is just like any other, only it lacks sex. In this case, people can have preference to whether or not they're straight, bi, gay, etc. So someone can completely be straight and asexual. They may not be interested in sex, but they can still maintain a relationship with the other gender just fine. I also think that it's worth noting that even if someone isn't interested in sex, they may still have it with their partner for whatever reason and still be asexual.

 

[Angder]

Speaking as someone Asexual, I would rather you ask than not ask and not understand because of it. Equally I did not find your post at all offensive.

For me the simple fact is I am Asexual because I just don't care. I have no interest in a long term relationship, no interest in Sex, and absolutely detest children. I don't actually feel attracted to anyone, and none of the other factors interest me, so why would I want to find a mate?

I guess you could argue the Asexual is less a sexuality, and more like a lack of sexuality. 

[Alegra737]

I am asexual, and my definition is that I'm not attracted to other people at all. I have friends, but I'm really not interested in sex or anything like that.

[Goblin Cat 😸]

Speaking as someone Asexual, I would rather you ask than not ask and not understand because of it. Equally I did not find our post at all offensive.

Every asexual is different, I was merely pointing out that the way the topic was worded could be potentially offensive to others. I am also asexual, which is why I responded to the thread to begin with, so I'm not sure how saying "I'm asexual and I don't think this is offensive" is supposed to support whether or not it is offensive or not. The point I was making was that it can be, as it was worded in a way that made me feel like an object to be poked at rather than a person. I was not pointing it out to be hateful so much as I was attempting to let the OP know so they could prevent doing so again in the future.

[Nrein]

Speaking as someone Asexual, I would rather you ask than not ask and not understand because of it. Equally I did not find our post at all offensive.

Every asexual is different, I was merely pointing out that the way the topic was worded could be potentially offensive to others. I am also asexual, which is why I responded to the thread to begin with, so I'm not sure how saying "I'm asexual and I don't think this is offensive" is supposed to support whether or not it is offensive or not. The point I was making was that it can be, as it was worded in a way that made me feel like an object to be poked at rather than a person. I was not pointing it out to be hateful so much as I was attempting to let the OP know so they could prevent doing so again in the future.

To be fair, this day and age, *anything* can be viewed as offensive to the right person. It could've been worded one way or another, but I'm sure someone out there, asexual or not, would be offended by it. It seems that in these communities, it's almost best not to say anything at all, even though that in itself can be viewed as offensive :V

Speaking as someone who isn't asexual, but has had asexual friends, it seems like this is as broad/vague as you can be when labeling your sexuality. Some have no sexual attraction at all, others only get it in relationships. Some don't even get romantic attraction, while others may only be seeking romance. Though I have run into quite a few people who tend to confuse being "asexual" with showing "abstinence."

[Alegra737]

I don't mind being called Asexual, if it's not in a deprecating manner.

[Goblin Cat 😸]

Speaking as someone Asexual, I would rather you ask than not ask and not understand because of it. Equally I did not find our post at all offensive.

Every asexual is different, I was merely pointing out that the way the topic was worded could be potentially offensive to others. I am also asexual, which is why I responded to the thread to begin with, so I'm not sure how saying "I'm asexual and I don't think this is offensive" is supposed to support whether or not it is offensive or not. The point I was making was that it can be, as it was worded in a way that made me feel like an object to be poked at rather than a person. I was not pointing it out to be hateful so much as I was attempting to let the OP know so they could prevent doing so again in the future.

To be fair, this day and age, *anything* can be viewed as offensive to the right person. It could've been worded one way or another, but I'm sure someone out there, asexual or not, would be offended by it. It seems that in these communities, it's almost best not to say anything at all, even though that in itself can be viewed as offensive :V

Just because, in your opinion, anything can be viewed as offensive doesn't mean I shouldn't point out. Again, I didn't do it out of anger or bitterness, I did it so the OP could learn for next time they handle asking questions to someone like that. I see no problem with it, and I'm not sure why people are jumping to defense when I've literally said I did it for learning reasons, no hard feelings.

[Angder]

Please you two. Calm down, Mort came off as aggressive for me, and I was unsure if Mort was Asexual or not and I wondered if he was being offended on our behalf. So I stated that I saw nothing wrong with what was said, and that I would accept more questions.

Now can we go back to declaring how little we care about certain things? like relationships and sex?

[Goblin Cat 😸]

It doesn't always have to do with a lack of caring.

Personally, I'm both asexual and aromantic, which means I do not seek romantic relationships on top of my lack of interest in sex.

[jinrui gaku]

Me being Asexual myself, mostly for me it is a limited amount of 'feelings' for sexual activity (Cares for it, but doesn't necessarily care at the same time, often for me it just means I'm not really interested in any sexual activity, however relationships are perfectly fine.) However i have found myself not necessarily caring for it anymore, so now i am leaning more into, Not caring about anything whatsoever that deals with such things lol. In other words,most definitions you look up about Asexual explains it as a lack or limited (Minimum) desire or craving for sexual type activities. (however bear in mind, everyone is different.)
Take care
~
Jinrui

[Furrball]

I will give you an example of asexuality, from my own personal experience. 


I had plenty of romantic crushes in high school. A few years after I graduated, I quite suddenly and randomly realized that I never- not even ONCE- imagined or thought anything sexual about them. I never wanted to do sexual things, and I never fantasized about anything other than a romantic, Disney-style kiss scene. And even then, I'm not huge on kissing either. But.. yeah. 

[Obey138 (Matthew "Fluffy")]

I will give you an example of asexuality, from my own personal experience. 


I had plenty of romantic crushes in high school. A few years after I graduated, I quite suddenly and randomly realized that I never- not even ONCE- imagined or thought anything sexual about them. I never wanted to do sexual things, and I never fantasized about anything other than a romantic, Disney-style kiss scene. And even then, I'm not huge on kissing either. But.. yeah. 

That's not a 100% asexuality, from what I'm aware