I've always gone with a friend, and part of the reason why I decided to skip NFC this year was that he wasn't sure he'd be able to go.
There's still just something about cons that really eats at me tho, even if I'm not going alone.
It's like this weird indescribable feeling of extreme loneliness, isolation and not-belonging, despite being literally surrounded by people who are "like me."
It's really overwhelming.
That I usually tend to end up spending the evenings with a group of Finnish furs who speak Finnish amongst themselves doesn't really help either.
I don't blame them for doing that and wouldn't have it any other way, but feeling like an outcast even among "my own kind" is such a strange feeling I can't even.
They're all really patient and friendly with me and don't really mind if I speak English, but it still feels awfully awkward to do so because it kinda messes with the flow of the conversation, so I usually just stay awkwardly quiet the whole time despite wanting to be social or whatever.
Perhaps one day when I'm less of a mess and better at all the things, I'll be able to go to a con and not be reduced to wobbly mess of whatever, but I don't see that happening any time soon.
*Sad kantele*
Topic: The Random Thread (Read 2092442 times)