I got this off another site I visit. I laughed so hard my sides hurt. I just had to share.
The following questions and answers were actually collected from SAT tests given in *****
in 2000 to 16-year-old students! (Don't
laugh too hard----one of these kids may be the
President someday.) (Yes, I deleted the town and state out of respect for the ones that are truly educated in the place).
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can
be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it
removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead
sheep and canoeists. (OOKKK)
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes
them perspire. (no comment)
Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky. (I sure hope that's a sky up there. LOL)
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs. (I guess SOMETHING had to keep it in place, right? mmmm)
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and
you get intercontinental. (ouch)
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. (Is that...never mind. LOL)
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death. (ROFL ROFL I would think so! ROFL)
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow. (Poor cow)
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized?
(E.g., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the
brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity.
The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains
the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity
contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.(NOOO COMMENT!!!)
Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie. (Hey, it works. LOL)
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby. (very close with an accent? I can go for that. LOL)
Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing
a condominium. (I think that might hurt a little)
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarian Section."
A: The caesarian section is a district in Rome.
(ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL)
Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.
(No wonder those things....never mind)
Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport. (no wonder I don't like airports.)
Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a
characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places
and so they look like umbrellas.
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight. (ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL)
Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab wears on his head. (OUCH)
Q: What is a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs. (Don't tell them that. ROFL ROFL ROFL)