Don't now what to do with my "friends" Hating and making fun of furries

[Isaac]

So I am just starting out in this fandom and I'm currently doing furry things in secret. no one knows, I think. I'm proudly "obsessed" with this fandom, and never want to leave, but my friends are constantly talking about how much they hate furries, and how they make fun of them. I feel like I should tell them, but I'm not sure. Please help!!!!

[Ori]

For your health I really wouldn't. Unless you really really trust your friends. Like I have friends that aren't openly hating the fandom, but they're creaped out by it. One of my trusted friends told my other friends. Those friends understand that I'm not the hardcore 'zealots' of the fandom. Like they understand that I'll keep it on the down low and am not planning to fursuit at walmart and wear bunny ears at college. It's kind of become an unspoken rule that so long as I don't bother them about furry stuff they're cool with me.

[anoni]

It's really your choice, I'm not gonna tell you whether you should tell them or not but I will give some advice IF (and only if) you decide to tell them.

If you tell them do not, I repeat do not, make a big deal out of it. What I mean is, don't go up to them and be like "I have something to tell you" and then have like a long speech and sheepishly go "I'm... I'm a furry!" because this reaction is negative in a lot of ways. It's a little cringey which will potentially devalue things, it makes it seem like furry is a HUGE deal to to you (and maybe it is! But you probably don't want your friends who don't like furries to see that), it will also make them immediately think being a furry is some shameful thing you're ashamed of (and in their eyes you should be ashamed of) and it just makes the whole situation uncomfortable. Don't get me wrong sometimes that approach can work, but in your case if they already don't like furries, it probably will cause you to lose friends.

So, if you do want to tell them, ease into it. Don't go straight into wearing collars, fursuits and the like in front of your friends. Just talk casually like its no big deal, don't go on about it all the time but just be like "Oh yeah, that story reminds me of this one guy, he's a furry but like he's pretty cool, anyway he did X", and then just slowly ease into it. You have to be gradual, first they learn you're a friend of a furry, eh that's probably ok, they might make a bit of fun of you but if you can shake off that teasing and be able to laugh at yourself they'll respect it and start to respect you. Then they find out a lot of your friends are furries, they might start accusing you of being a furry, shrug it off, don't directly answer the question and just take it as friendly banter. Then one day you'll just start saying you're a furry, it won't be a big deal, it'll just happen and they'll be like "Well you're obviously a furry" and you can be like "Just cause I own a fursuit and go to furry conventions doesn't mean I'm a furry ". Point is have a sense of humour about it, show (to them at least) it isn't a big deal and you're not making it a big deal. They'll respect you, in my experience this absolutely works.

[SerpentineSlither]

Honestly I have found that threatening a good bite does the trick, and if after that they still decide to judge you, you are best off just abandoning the pack and being an independent fur

[Athlaros]

Had a similar issue with my friends actually. I just kind of told them. They actually didn't care and since I'm so cynical myself, I take the leak of the fandom when they do it as well. I generally act as teacher as well, and try to be neutral in my perspective about education on the furry fandom. If your friends really are your friends, they'll still love you but friendship involves some teasing (just make sure it isn't hitting you too close to home).


Also, as told up before, don't make it a big deal. Being a furry isn't like coming out, it's a fandom - not a religion. Have fun.

[L. Jay Echoes]

I had a few questions. What is the nature of your relationship with your friends? Are they the kind who entertain you? Are they there to offer moral support? Are they professional friends? I assume they are the first kind, but I would like to know what you guys think of one another. What kind of "hate" do they express? E.g, do they see furries as perverts, or do they think it's just childish?

I often ask questions when I see someone asking for advice. I really think that, when it comes to something that really doesn't have one right way to go about this (and there are wrong ways, mentioned by the other posters here), you need to come to your own conclusions.